Unforgettable: Marketing | Niche | Personal Brand |sales | Communication | Business | Visibility

As a sensitive leader, I can lead a 90-minute coaching call for my Messenger Mastermind and be energetically DONE.  Even though it was a fantastic, connected session that brought tears and aha moments to my clients and enlivened, inspired, and fulfilled me.  I’m intense. Focused. In that hour and a half, I was fully present and gave my 100%. I left nothing on the table.  And after, I need to recharge.  In the past, I felt shame for that, for seemingly having a “lower” capacity than other leaders. If you’re thinking, “me too,” it’s time for a reframe.  It’s not that you don’t have the capacity. It’s that your capacity goes deep rather than wide.  And you know what happens if you don’t honor your deep capacity, if you pretend you also have the capacity to go wide and just push through?  You get stuck circling the burnout / recovery loop. (Trust me, I know.) The good news is that, if your capacity runs deep, you don’t also need to force yourself to go wide.  You don’t have to deplete yourself by engaging with th

When you’re a coach, the right support is key to growing your business. And when you’re a leader, the right support will help you unlock your voice and share your message with the world.  I’ve spent several years leading programs for quiet leaders and a decade navigating business programs, coaches, and courses as a sensitive, introverted leader in the online biz world. During that time, I’ve learned that crowded spaces where everyone has to shout over each other are NOT where I (or other quiet folks) thrive.  And that’s okay.  It just means we have to recognize what we do need when we’re looking for support. There are 4 important needs sensitive, introverted leaders have that often get overlooked – especially when it comes to coaching containers. In episode 188 of Quiet Messenger, I break down what to look out for to find support that fits your needs. Because if you’ve felt invisible, ignored, or overwhelmed in business programs, I want you to know that you’re not the problem.  The problem is that the contain

Have you ever noticed that there’s an assumption society makes that introverts and quiet folks MUST be followers? I had an aha moment while watching Nikki Ling’s TEDx talk “Quiet Confidence: Follow the Introverted Leader” where words were put to a bias that now seems so obvious.  But, you know what I’ve noticed?  Sensitive biz owners are actually born rule breakers. This is a consistent theme I see in the folks I work with. (And in myself – yes, even me in all my Virgo Capricorn-ness.) As thoughtful, deep feeling introverts who like to reflect and let things percolate, we have a heightened need to break free of “do this” marketing advice – formulas, templates and 10-step strategies.  Part of the superpower of sensitivity is that we’re really tuned into whether something feels right.  Or whether it feels off.  It may be inconvenient in that it’s harder for us to just follow plug-and-play business advice. But it’s actually a gift in being able to navigate our own way…if we’re just given the space and guidance t

If you’ve gotten a lot of solid, smart marketing advice from business programs BUT have been listening to your intuition and it’s telling you… That some of the strategies you were given don’t actually mesh for you.  That what you were being told to do felt like putting on a persona. That the copy you created from that advice doesn’t really feel like you. That the guidance didn’t jive with your introvertedness, your sensitivity. Today’s episode of Quiet Messenger is for you. And also… When something feels off or performative to you, I see that as wisdom. That’s the wisdom of your sensitivity. It’s not something to be bypassed or pushed through. It’s not a sign you’re not enough of a badass boss or that if you just do it this way it’ll work.  In this episode, I’m talking about where the line is between clarifying a cohesive brand message — and focusing on being “on brand” in your messaging.  Because I’ve found being “on brand” really doesn’t work for Quiet Messengers, introverted leaders and sensitive souls. In

Often as introverts and sensitive folks in a loud, outward-focused world, we have needs that get overlooked or make us feel weak or “too much” in some way.  Whether it’s a need to leave early from a social situation when we’re tapped out, or to retreat to private space to ride an emotional wave, or to have less work tasks in a day to ease overwhelm and fully focus on each, those needs matter. We are allowed to set up our businesses and our work around the needs we have as sensitive introverts. The problem happens when all we see are leaders who are “on” all the time, who answer messages instantly and engage vigorously online, who manage 20 clients and five offerings, who always have the loudest voice in the room, who go from meeting to meeting without needing to take the rest of the afternoon off to recharge, who are direct and bold and decisive and fast.  When those are the leaders getting most of the airspace, we may think it’s not possible to be a successful introverted, sensitive, deep processing or quiet

A month ago, I realized that there’s a topic I’ve been dancing around with you for the last two years.  That my work is for sensitive introverts. Quiet Messengers. Big feelers who like cozy spaces for connection, growth and processing.  We might be vocal and spirited in the small, intimate container of our Messenger Masterminds, but putting things out into the world…that’s different. Especially when we think we need to try to show up the extroverted, bold way that’s been modeled for us since the dawn of online business and leadership.  And while we’re often told we’re not loud enough to be a leader, we also feel like we’re too much in so many other ways. What I’m here to say is this… Quiet doesn’t mean silent. And in a noisy room, it doesn’t have to be the loudest person that gets heard. It can be the clearest person. Clear messaging cuts through the noise without having to shout above the crowd…or contort yourself into some marketing or leadership strategy that wasn’t made for you in the first place.  What w

Without being clear in your messaging, you can do a lot of marketing busywork that gets ignored, doesn’t build your community or doesn’t compel people to buy. YET… There’s a lot of messaging out there that is very clear but is also manipulative, selling at all costs and using unethical tactics that don’t leave customers making empowered decisions.  If you’re anything like me… You don’t just want to sell, you want to do it in a way that leaves the world better than when you found it. In this end cap to our season of Values-Based Messaging Foundations, I lay out what it means to be both clear AND connected in your messaging.  And how being clear can actually help you create connection.  Listen in. Deeper support from me: What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. My Messenger Mastermind is an intimate circle of 3-6 women coaches & leaders who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging and grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line. Whi

I know you’ve got a big heart and you’re SO GOOD at your work…but in order to keep doing your work, you need paying clients.  That’s where being able to clearly communicate what uniquely positions you comes in.  Because when you are the ONLY one qualified for the job, your dream clients will happily pay you.  Not in a way that’s sleazy or manipulative or about “getting” clients.  In a way that’s totally in service by communicating what you already, in your heart, know about how you’ll be able to help them.  In this episode, I’m going to share with you my personal brand matrix to clarify and communicate what uniquely positions you.  The four S’s. (Listen and you’ll see what I mean!) I talk about: How to get specific on & integrate the 4 key elements into your messaging to own who you are as a coach so the right clients won’t settle for anyone else Why you’ll no longer need to worry about doing the same work as everyone else or having the same message that’s been shared a million times before The story

Okay…so let’s talk about getting crickets and what it feels like to always be chasing clients.  Ugh, I know. Frustrating stuff. Want to know one of the biggest challenges I see to coaches and leaders reaching their people?  First, let me say that this is not about popularity, likes or followers.  It’s about really reaching your people on a deeper level where they feel connected to what you’re saying and like it’s for them. So what’s the challenge? When what you say is general and generic.  Because when your messaging isn’t specific and relevant to ONE PERSON, it doesn’t connect with anyone.  So how do you let your people know your work is truly for them? And what about if you don’t want to leave anybody out?  That’s what today’s episode of Unforgettable is all about. I talk about: The key to clearly expressing what you say so it lands for your people A visualization to help you build the narrative of who your work is for How to CONNECT through messaging in integrity rather than manipulation Deeper suppo

If you’re anything like me, there are likely one or two TED talks that have made a big impact on you.  Two for me are Susan Cain’s The power of introverts and Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie’s The danger of a single story. What do they have in common that made them land so powerfully? A clear message.  But if you’re going to use your voice and share your truth, you first need clarity on what you’re saying. Today’s episode is dedicated to helping you tap into your message. (or the next evolution of it) Because even if you KNOW you have something BIG to say… Sometimes you’re just not sure what.  Or you have an idea but it’s fuzzy. Or what you’ve been talking about no longer feels congruent.  Or you’re ready to claim what you want to be known for.  Listen in. Deeper support from me: Join the FREE 5-day Message Clarity Challenge to cut through the noise and calls in your people…without having to change who you are. Starts March 22nd, 2021!  What’s your Messenger Archetype? Take the quiz. My Messenger Mastermind is an

Today begins a brand new season of Unforgettable! A season dedicated to taking us back to the foundations of messaging.  Starting with… What is messaging, really? Believe me, I’ve heard a lot of myths and misunderstandings in the past several years I’ve been leading messaging workshops and Masterminds! That it’s all about wordsmithing or dialing in your elevator pitch.  That there’s a “right” way to do it — following formulas and scripts that work for others.  That it’s about selling at all costs and has to feel icky or robotic to be successful.  But when you’re a sensitive Messenger who cares deeply, values-based messaging is where your power lies. Because there’s a difference between simply following copywriting rules and marketing tactics and messaging according to your integrity. So, fresh on the heels of the Speaking to What Matters series, it’s time to re-define what messaging really is.  We start with today’s episode, where you’ll learn the difference between core message and messaging plus how to rese

Closing out Speaking to What Matters: Conversations on Messaging for a More Just World, here is my personal debrief with specific aha moments and learnings I took away from each leader about how to show up for social justice in your messaging. Listen in. A Few Takeaways: You can’t slap up new inclusive messaging on your website and expect more diverse clients to come. Messaging is the end point after you’ve done the internal work and learning. (Hat tip to convos with Cher Hale and Trudi Lebron.) Be discerning. There’s no formula for knowing when to pass the mic / when to speak up / what to say / how to do any of this. (HT Erica Courdae and Nisha Moodley.) Be really clear, specific and explicit about who your work is for. More words vs collapsing people into narrow labels for the sake of tidy marketing. (HT Kelly Diels and Trudi Lebron.) Slow down. Harm often happens when we’re moving so fast and not taking time to be intentional and present and see the actual humans in front of us. (HT Tamala Poljak, N

We’re all continually learning & navigating how to share in these times which are highly polarized and where a lot of our collective trauma is at the surface.  As my guest today, Nisha Moodley, points out, we’re just at the beginning of learning how to be together on the internet. And we’re unlearning + relearning how to do it in a different, more generative way. Nisha is an Integrative Leadership Coach who’s been supporting women to liberate their leadership and weave their gifts in service of our shared vision for the past 10 years. With an Indian father who escaped apartheid in South Africa and a mother who traveled around the world consulting with the UN on democratic elections, she grew up having justice-oriented conversations at the dinner table.  This can be a scary time to share our ideas, thoughts, hearts and work online, especially if we are empaths, highly sensitive, or naturally more private or quiet.  And also, with the rush of social media and online business training ingrained into us, it c

After decades as an artist and musician, Tamala Poljak decided to become a therapist because they’re passionate about working with people who have felt othered. Now they almost exclusively work with the LGBTQIA+ population and a lot with triadic partnerships, polyamory and different ways that people create family and home. Coming from a generation that couldn’t even imagine going by a pronoun that was more congruent with who they are, they help their clients find themselves and know what it feels like to be genuinely SEEN.  In this conversation, Tamala and I talk about CIS-centering, pronouns and what it means to be a leader. Also, being present with the person in front of you and not be so quick to make an assumption about their identity based on whether they wear makeup or have muscles, or how they dress or style their hair. Listen in. Tamala and I talk about Why an apology when you misgender someone means they have to take care of you — and what they really need from you The practice of loving this body

Today we hear from Trudi Lebron, a sought-after DEI Consultant whose goals are to: Bring more Black, brown, indigenous, latinx folks and other people of color into the coaching industry, both as practitioners AND participants Help white coaches create more diversity, equity and safer spaces to bring BIPOC folks into With a Masters (and PhD-in-progress) in Social Psychology and experience as a bi-racial teen mom on welfare who worked her way up in the non-profit sector while building her own business, she has a unique perspective on using our businesses for social good.  And she’s seen some of the biggest mistakes well-intentioned people make in the coaching industry.  In this conversation, we dive deep into the nuances of crafting messaging that speaks to your people AND values, and the difference between being a leader for equity online and the actual coaching container you can safely hold. Listen in. Trudi and I talk about How niching down can create safety…and why radical inclusivity in your space can

If we design for the people with the most marginalized identities, the experience improves for everyone else. That’s a core belief of Kelly Diels, a Feminist Marketing Consultant who trains feminist copywriters and helps bake our beliefs into our business practices to generate money and justice. She saw that, working in the women’s empowerment space, those who don’t identify as women often get excluded.  To make her space as welcoming and inclusive as possible, she centers the people with the least dominant identities in her spaces and makes her policies and practices around them.  If you’re looking for grounded guidance you can apply immediately to your website and business practices, this episode is super-actionable. (I took a long list of notes for my own business!)  In episode 174, you’ll hear nitty-gritty copywriting advice, word shifts, and exact practices she uses.  Listen in. Kelly and I talk about Why it’s a myth that aligning your work with your values will make you less money The filter question

Today’s conversation is with Cher Hale, a publicist & founder who’s using her PR company to amplify the voices of underrepresented and marginalized groups.  After a year of offering podcast pitching services, Cher started noticing that the clients coming to her were mainly white upper-class life coaches.  They were paying her well and sustaining a good, consistent business. BUT she was telling the same stories, “I was moderately unhappy in my life and so I hired a life coach which helped me a bunch and so I became a life coach to help others who were in my situation, too.”  And while that’s a totally valid story, she knew it wasn’t what moved her.  But it was scary to make a major shift in business when she was getting consistent revenue and had bills to pay.  Then her mother passed away at the young age of 49 without fulfilling the dream of being a published erotic romance author. Her mother, a Taiwanese Black immigrant, hadn’t had the privilege that so many of us, as online business owners, have – to ha

Today, we’re joined by Diversity, Equity, and Inclusion (DEI) Coach Erica Courdae in a conversation that will make it easier for you to keep speaking up ~ especially if you’re scared you’ll mess up. This is to get us into imperfect action…even that thoughtful, caring side of ourselves that second-guesses what we share and just wants to say it the “right” way. What I learned from Erica: Being in conversation with people who don’t look, live or love the way that you do is essential for us to collectively get to a place where no one has to feel othered.  Listen in. Erica and I talk about: How to avoid going down the shame spiral of, “Oh no, I did that wrong!” The ableist phrase I unconsciously used in our conversation…that’s common in the leadership community Why what you watch on tv, the music you listen to, the brands you trust, and the experts you follow all affect your strength as an ally Where Erica sees well-intentioned people mess up when using a DEI framework How to discern when to speak up and when to

Here we are, at the first episode of Speaking to What Matters: Conversations on Messaging for a More Just World.  It’s my hope that this series of informal, real conversations with social justice leaders brings you at least one shift, aha moment, or breakthrough in how you want to show up.  Here’s where we’ll be going & who we’ll be learning from: [171] Messaging For a More Just World [172] Being an Imperfect Ally…When You’re a Sensitive Soul with Erica Courdae  [173] Evolving Your Work to Have a Social Justice Lens with Cher Hale [174 Feminist Marketing & Copy that Doesn’t Oppress with Kelly Diels [175] Is My Niche Excluding Marginalized People? With Trudi Lebron  [176] CIS- & Hetero-Normativity in Our Leadership with Tamala Poljak [177] Speaking About Issues Without Co-Opting Them to “Sell” with Nisha Moodley [178] What I Learned From 6 Social Justice Leaders About Messaging Today’s episode is our starting place, setting the foundation to lean into this series.  In all honesty, I sat for a wh

Each time I have meaningful conversations with would-be messengers as I enroll my Messenger Mastermind, several shared beliefs emerge.  These 6 beliefs, left unchecked, can easily keep you from expanding your impact as a Messenger. In this week’s episode, I’m going to show you how to transform those beliefs into your greatest allies so you can grow your biz and impact for years to come! ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ As you’ll hear, I’m not immune to them either. I’ve had to move through them (and in some cases still am) in my business.  Listen in. We talk about: The reason you already have what you need to make a big difference Why you should become a Messenger Geek :~) What it means to build your Messenger Team How to make your priorities line up with your to-do list Deeper support from me: Enrollment closes this month for my Messenger Mastermind. It’s for women who want to feel solid, confident & consistent in their messaging and grow a movement that matters ~ both to the world and to their business’ bottom line.