The.village.idiom

Dogs can not see your bones but cats can

When Mozart was alive he was a composer but now he is a decomposer

Today someone was killed with a starter pistol... the police think its race related

My friend got in hot water with a mime and that mime said unspeakable things to him.

Two hats are hanging on a hat rack. One says to the other.. You stay here. I will go on a head.

boy.. that escalated quickly.. I mean that really got out of hand fast.

I buy my guns from a guy called TRex... he is a small arms dealer.

My friend said he could make a gun with his 3D printer... but I have had a Canon printer for years.

AD. seeking a man to cross breeds labradors and poodles. A labradoodle dude will do

Im not humble.. Im just not good enough at anything to be proud.

Ikes wife is an 80s fire and brimstone saying... Tina Turner burn

Seafarers can hear the calm before the storm. The sound is a sea flat

What is grey and unimportant... an irrelephant

The waiter spilled chowder on my trousers so I said HEY. There is soup in my fly

And again

The Lord did not walk on water after the resurrection because it is harder with holes in your feet

My boss asked why I came into the office with corona virus. He misheard... I said I have a case of Corona

My son teases me for quitting a marathon after 1km. Its become a running joke.

When Chuck Norris was a kid. His parents slept in his bed when they were scared.

The reason the Avengers have the best parade float is due to their huge banner.