Sexology

Welcome to Episode 473 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Dr. Nicole Thompson, who speaks to me about psychedelic-informed sexuality, chemsex, and harm reduction in erotic spaces.A quick note for my single listeners in California, if you're craving intentional, psychologically grounded ways to meet people. We have a beautiful offering coming up through LALOVELAB.com; a company I co-created with my colleague Dr. Richard Espinoza. Our next matchmaking event is Saturday February 7th at 4:00pm hosted at the Craft Contemporary Museum in LA. It's thoughtfully curated experience designed by us to help you connect with intention, not apps. In this episode, we discuss how psychedelics intersect with sexuality, pleasure, and relationships, beginning with a reframe of what we even mean by “drugs” and altered states. We also talk about how substances such as MDMA, psilocybin, and ketamine can act as non-specific amplifiers, and why intention, set, and setting matter so deeply when people

Welcome to Episode 472 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Anya Laeta, August McLaughlin, Bel Di Lorenzo, Dr. Elliot Justin, Dr. Evan Goldstein, Dr. Maria Sophocles, Nicoletta Heidegger and Suzannah Weiss as part of this special episode on setting goals for sexual health in 2026. As we move into the new year, I want to slow things down a bit and move away from rigid resolutions that are often rooted in pressure, shame, or performance. In this episode, I’m bringing together voices you already know and trust to help reframe sexual health goals as supportive practices rather than benchmarks to pass or fail. Throughout this episode, we discuss your capacity for pleasure, enhancing communication, and letting go of narrow definitions of what sex is supposed to look like. We also look at nervous system safety, pelvic floor health, pleasure practices, sex technology, and intimacy in midlife. This episode aims to remind you that great sex isn’t about fixing yourself; it's about developing s

Welcome to Episode 471 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Ita O’Brien, who speaks to me about intimacy coordination, embodied consent, and creating safety and authenticity in intimate storytelling.In this episode, I sit down with Ita to discuss what an intimacy coordinator actually does and why this role has become so essential in film, television, and theatre. We talk about how intimacy coordination brings structure, clarity, and care to intimate scenes, not only to protect performers, but to serve the story, the characters, and the creative vision. Ita O’Brien is an intimacy coordinator and movement director for film, television, and theater. For more than a decade, she has been developing “intimacy on set” guidelines: best practices for working on scenes with sexual content and nudity in film, TV, and theater. O’Brien pioneered the role of intimacy coordinator, which is used in production companies including HBO and Netflix. Her work has been featured in publications such as The Gu

Welcome to Episode 470 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Margeaux Feldman, who speaks to me about trauma, chronic illness, intimacy, and pleasure, inspired by their book Touch Me. I’m Sick.In this episode, we discuss the personal and academic journey that led them to write Touch Me. I’m Sick., which began as a PhD dissertation and evolved into a deeply human book about sickness, trauma, disability, and love. Margeaux shares how their own experience with chronic illness shifted their work away from purely academic analysis and toward something more accessible, relational, and rooted in lived experience. Margeaux Feldman is a writer, a public educator, and an artist. They hold an MFA in Creative Writing from CalArts and a PhD in English Literature and Sexual Diversity Studies from the University of Toronto. Margeaux's first book Touch Me, I'm Sick: A Memoir in Essays was just published with Beacon Press. They also created the popular meme account @softcore_trauma on Instagram,

Welcome to Episode 469 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Laura Federico and Morgan Miller who speak to me about cycle tracking, hormones, and the mind body connection in sexuality and health. In this episode, we discuss what inspired Laura and Morgan to write their book “The Cycle Book” and how their personal and professional experiences shaped their approach. We talk about the profound gaps in education around hormones, menstruating bodies, and sexual health, and how this lack of information often leaves people feeling confused, dismissed, or disconnected from their own bodies. Laura Federico is a psychotherapist and AASECT-certified sex and relationship therapist in private practice, and Morgan Miller is a certified professional midwife, lactation consultant, activist, and birth center founder in private practice. Developed by Laura & Morgan, The Cycle Book helps you find clarity, the right treatment, and real relief, so you can finally feel like yourself again. We’re in the mi

Welcome to Episode 468 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Dr. Alyssa Yee, who speaks to me about the realities of vulvar and vaginal pain, the challenges of diagnosis, and how partners can offer meaningful support. In this conversation, we discuss the wide range of painful symptoms many vulva owners experience, from burning and sharp stinging at the vestibule to deeper pelvic discomfort that can appear during or after sexual activity. Dr. Yee helps clarify how conditions such as vestibulodynia, hormonal disruptions, pelvic venous disorders, and endometriosis often go unrecognized or are dismissed in medical settings, leaving patients feeling isolated and unsure where to turn for help. Dr. Alyssa Yee is a Sexual Medicine Physician and Reconstructive Urologist who completed her clinical fellowship at San Diego Sexual Medicine in 2021-2022 under the mentorship of Dr. Irwin Goldstein. In her fellowship, she was awarded the SMSNA Foundation Research grant to investigate the pathophysiology

Welcome to Episode 467 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Suzannah Weiss who speaks to me about understanding and addressing the orgasm gap in long term relationships.In this conversation, we look at why orgasm inequality persists even among couples who consider themselves progressive, communicative, and sexually informed. We discuss how cultural narratives, media scripts, and outdated beliefs continue to shape expectations around women’s pleasure, often leaving vulva owners feeling inadequate or unseen in intimate relationships. Suzannah Weiss is a writer, sexologist, and psychotherapist in Los Angeles. She is the author of Eve's Blessing: Uncovering the Lost Pleasure Behind Female Pain and Subjectified: Becoming a Sexual Subject. She runs a psychotherapy practice focused on sex and couples' therapy and neurodiversity. She is also a certified sex educator, sexual assault counselor, and birth doula.In this episode, you will hear: ·      Understanding the Origins of the Orgasm

Welcome to Episode 466 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I am excited to be joined by Jessica Fern who speaks to me about consensual non-monogamy, secure attachment, and the inner work required to build healthy open relationships.In this conversation, Jessica shares her personal journey into non-monogamy and the ways her clinical work pushed her to explore the topic more deeply. We talk about emotional exclusivity, the origins of Polysecure, and how people can distinguish between personal triggers, relational dynamics, and the messages they have absorbed from society. Jessica offers thoughtful insights on insecurity, jealousy, and the importance of intentional repair when conflict arises. Jessica Fern holds a Master’s degree in Conflict Resolution, is a Certified Clinical Trauma Professional, a trained Internal Family Systems (IFS) practitioner, and an integrative therapist drawing on 25 years of experience in somatic, narrative, psychotherapeutic, and spiritual healing modalities. She is the internationally rec

Welcome to Episode 465 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Jessica Baum, who speaks to me about how attachment styles shape our sexual connection and intimacy within long-term relationships. In this episode, we explore how attachment theory helps us understand why so many couples struggle with maintaining desire over time. We discuss how patterns rooted in early childhood, such as anxious, avoidant, and disorganized attachment, influence not only our emotional connection but also our erotic lives. Jessica explains how couples often repeat familiar relational scripts, sometimes mistaking intensity or chaos for passion, and how real intimacy requires safety, awareness, and conscious effort.Jessica Baum is a licensed psychotherapist whose journey began with a lifelong curiosity about the “Whys” of life, why we feel, connect, and experience the world the way we do. This passion led her to specialize in trauma, attachment theory, and interpersonal neurobiology. Jessica believes that connecti

Welcome to Episode 464 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Riana Milne, who speaks to me about emotional disconnection, communication breakdowns, and their impact on sexual desire in relationships. In this episode, Riana and I explore how emotional safety and communication are at the heart of sexual connection. We discuss why unresolved conflicts and stress responses, like fight, flight, or freeze, can suppress desire, and how couples can learn to reconnect through conscious communication and emotional regulation. Riana Milne MA is a Certified, Global Life and Love Trauma Recovery Coach, a Cert. Clinical Trauma & Addictions Professional, a Certified Mindfulness Coach, #1 Bestselling Author, the Host of her Podcast called Lessons in Life & Love'', an Educational Speaker, and Licensed Mental Health Counselor for over 21 years living in Palm Beach County, Florida. Riana specializes in helping those who have had past Childhood or Love Relationship Trauma to Heal, Transform &

Welcome to Episode 463 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by, Hily Dating App's sexologist and sexuality educator, Dr. Mindy DeSeta, who speaks to me about flirting, sexting, and the art of digital consent in modern dating.In this conversation, we discuss how to move from casual conversations to more intimate ones, without it feeling awkward or forced. Dr. DeSeta shares how flirting and sexting are forms of vulnerable communication, not just sexual expression, and why pacing, consent, and emotional awareness are vital. We also touch upon the nuances of reading digital signals, how to avoid common mistakes like jumping ahead too soon, and what healthy, sexy communication looks like in both text and real life. Dr. Mindy DeSeta has a Doctorate in Clinical Sexology and is a Board Certified Sex Therapist and a Licensed Mental Health Counselor. She has been in private practice since 2017 when she founded her concierge and bespoke mental health practice, Insight Counseling Center Miami. From

Welcome to Episode 462 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Ali Mezey, who speaks to me about ‘The Heart Sexuality Split’, a powerful framework she uses to help clients understand how love, desire, and trauma shape our most intimate connections.In this conversation, we explore the concept of ‘The Heart Sexuality Split’, how many people find themselves loving but not desiring their partners. Ali explains her Personal Geometry model, which uses physical mapping to externalize inner dynamics, offering profound insight into where we may feel emotionally blocked or disconnected. She also shares her own story of growing up in a sexualized environment, the early disconnection between heart and body, and her journey toward reintegrating love, desire, and authenticity.Ali Mezey is a Body Therapist, Family Constellation Work Facilitator, Sexologist and Media Maker with over 40 years of experience. Ali has worked in renowned rehab centers in Los Angeles for sex, drug, and alcohol addiction. She dev

Welcome to Episode 461 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Alicia Sinclair a renowned sex coach and founder of several leading sexual wellness brands, including B Vibe and Le Wand. Alicia and I explore how sex toys can be a tool for enhancing both psychological and physical arousal, whether through role play, sensation play, or simply adding novelty to the bedroom. We also unpack the common fears and misconceptions couples have when introducing toys into their relationship, and how to approach these conversations with openness and curiosity rather than insecurity.Alicia is a multi-award-winning Sex Tech CEO, founder, and renowned sex coach. She brings over two decades of expertise in designing innovative products, leading transformative training programs, and advocating for sex positivity.Her mission is to champion sexual wellness as a vital part of a healthy lifestyle, empowering people to explore pleasure without shame. Prior to founding her three brands, Alicia was the VP of worldwid

Welcome to Episode 460 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Lianna Walden, who speaks to me about how men and couples can deepen intimacy and connection through embodiment, sexual energy work, and practical worship rituals.In this conversation, Lianna and I explore the often-overlooked challenges men face in today’s evolving sexual landscape. We discuss her concept of “lingham activation”, a tantric-inspired approach to connecting with sexual energy through breathwork, embodiment, and intentional control. Lianna explains how many men have become disconnected from their bodies due to technology, stress, and societal conditioning.  Lianna Walden works in the intimate and sexual realm - guiding individuals and couples through deep, embodied transformation in their relationships, sexuality, and sense of self. With over 20 years of experience in transformation, relationship healing, and embodied leadership, she brings a multidimensional approach to personal growth and empowerment.Her work is

Welcome to Episode 459 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Matthew Bennett, who speaks to me about life as a porn creator, the realities of OnlyFans, and how kink skills can translate into everyday life and even the workplace.In this conversation, Matthew opens up about his unexpected journey into adult content creation, sharing both the challenges and rewards of working on platforms like OnlyFans and JustForFans. We talk about how fetish and kink content often push against mainstream limitations, the misconceptions around creator earnings, and the importance of understanding consent and boundaries when producing explicit material.English Leather Master (often known as ELM), also known to friends and family as Matthew, is an ICF (International Coach Federation) PCC-accredited life and executive coach and a BSCH (British Society of Clinical Hypnosis) registered hypnotherapist. He also trains individuals in both coaching and hypnosis. Matthew works extensively with LGBTQ+ and kinky commun

Welcome to Episode 458 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Sarah Intelligator, a divorce attorney and author who brings such a fascinating perspective on dating, relationships, and why so many marriages end the way they do.Sarah shares how two decades in family law, and her own journey through divorce and remarriage, have shaped her perspective on why relationships break down. She has seen the same patterns repeat themselves in countless cases, and she is passionate about helping people understand those pitfalls before it’s too late. Sarah Intelligator is a divorce attorney in Los Angeles, California. She earned a Juris Doctorate from Southwestern Law School. She graduated from UCLA, cum laude, with a Bachelor of Arts in English. Practicing Family Law since 2008, Sarah has also been a yoga instructor since 2000. She organically bridged her two worlds, coining the term: “Holistic Divorce and Family Law.” In helping others through their divorces, Sarah realised that she could help them av

Welcome to Episode 457 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I'm excited to be joined by Kevin Patterson who speaks to me about polyamory, representation, and emotional literacy.In this conversation, Kevin shares his journey into consensual non-monogamy and the inspiration behind Poly Role Models, a project designed to broaden representation of polyamory beyond narrow stereotypes. Kevin Patterson is an active member of the Philadelphia polyamory community. He's been practicing ethical nonmonogamy since August of 2002 after opening up a relationship that eventually became his marriage. In April of 2015, Kevin was inspired to start Poly Role Models, an interview series for people describing their experiences with polyamory. Poly Role Models was part of a drive and a desire to change the way our lives and communities are viewed. To continue that discussion of polyamorous representation, Kevin has extended the blog's work into the writing of the book, Love's Not Color Blind: Race and Representation in Po

Welcome to Episode 456 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Allana Pratt, Annette Benedetti, Caitlin V, Dr. Margaret Cochran, Rob Kancler, Susan Bratton, and Sylvia Solit who help me answer one powerful question: What’s one thing women wish men knew about sex, but almost never say out loud?Across this conversation, our guests share profound insights into how women truly experience desire and intimacy. You’ll hear why slowing down, building safety, and creating emotional connection are essential foundations for passion. We discuss the hidden fantasies and longings that many women never voice, the importance of curiosity and play, and how sex is far more than just physical technique, it’s a whole-body, mind, and spirit experience. Our guests also emphasize how communication itself can be deeply erotic, and that balancing sensitivity with power opens the door to deeper intimacy.In this episode, you will hear:·      Allana Pratt On Safety And Slow Build-Up·      Annette Benedetti On Hidden D

Welcome to Episode 455 of the Sexology Podcast! Today I’m excited to be joined by Dr. Elisabeth Sheff who speaks to me about consensual non-monogamy, polyamory, and soloamory.In this episode, Dr. Eli shares her personal journey navigating relationships with both monogamous and polyamorous partners, and how those experiences shaped her professional research. We talk in-depth about "soloamory" which refers to prioritizing one's relationship with themselves, often in the form of self-love. It is a form of autosexuality/autoromance and a conscious choice to live a single life, valuing autonomy and personal growth over traditional relationship milestones like marriage or cohabitation. Dr. Elisabeth “Eli” Sheff is a researcher, expert witness, coach, speaker, and educational consultant. With a PhD in Sociology and certification as a Sexuality Educator from AASECT, Dr. Eli specializes in gender and sexual minority families, consensual non-monogamy, and kink/BDSM. Sheff is the foremost academic expert on

Welcome to Episode 454 of the Sexology Podcast! Today, I’m excited to be joined by Sam L. Feldman, who speaks to me about ethical non-monogamy, swinging, and the evolution of sexual liberation across the decades.In this episode, Sam shares insights from his book Hookups, Hiccups and Happenstances, which reflects on the changing landscape of sexuality from the 1960s and 70s through to today. We discuss the social shifts that empowered women during this period, the origins of swinging, and how personal boundaries and communication have shaped Sam’s own 62-year marriage.Married for 61 years and counting, Sam is an excellent spokesperson on love and the many ways it can be explored. A number of the “hookups” he writes about in his book come from his real experiences of being in “the right place at the right time” during the Sexual Revolution. He also says he invented a sex position in this era. The position he's dubbed "the corkscrew” takes three people, unlike his other favorite position: 69.In this epis