Enlightened By Dogs With Kathy Kawalec

“The more opportunities I give my dogs to say no, the more likely they are to say yes when it's really important.” This is Kathy’s framework for giving dogs real-life choices in a way that works for everyone.   In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy talks about lifestyle choices, agency, responsibility, and freedom. She also shares some real-life examples of how this looks in real-life situations, with real dogs.    For some dog moms, it could be their badge of honor to have a well-trained, obedient dog that always listens to what they’re told. But for Kathy, her badge of honor is that her dogs choose to be attentive, responsive, and responsible and that they trust her to be their guide in any situation.    Also, Kathy emphasizes the importance of being clear on your “why’s,” explains in detail the little steps to connect, observe, and decide, and dives into the concept of “ask, don't ask, and prepare for the ask.”    So to learn more about the framework of giving your dogs real-life choices that lead

Are you a dog mom who struggles with leash reactivity? Kathy knows how stressful it is when you have a dog that pulls hard on the leash. Having a dog that is lunging toward (or away from) other dogs, moving objects, or anything that triggers them is not a pleasant experience for anyone.    In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy shares a real-life coaching call with a dog mom who was struggling with leash reactivity.  Her in-depth explanation of the process of walking as partners with your dog during this coaching session is going to change things with you and your dog!    There are specific things that  you can do when your dog becomes reactive on the leash that will lead to walking as partners. One of the important things is to make an intentional choice about when and where to walk your reactive dog so that you are likely to have a great walk.    Creating what Kathy calls “Green Zone Experiences” is what will help you and your dog to finally break free of the leash reactivity spiral that you are stuc

This is something  I always hear from many dog moms a lot of times. They keep on asking why their dogs don’t trust them, their dogs don’t allow them to support them and show them that everything is okay.    Sometimes, we deal with some behavior challenges in our dogs where they are not calm, they are reactive, hyperactive, and even seem to be so anxious and worried. Then, since we love our furry friends very much, we tend to figure things out to help them. But, at the end of the day, you end up realizing that everything you did seems not to work out as you expected.    So instead of helping your dogs with an approach that you think is appropriate and effective, the result that you’re getting is the complete opposite.    In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy wants to help you turn these things around and encourages you to make use of the insights she wants to share with you to change your partnership lifestyle with your dog.    Kathy talks in detail about the actionable steps or a decision tree, and so

When we dig deeper under the surface, the REAL stories of reactive dogs are revealed. We too often negatively label dogs as reactive, as if that was a behavior they chose. Maya is a perfect example of a dog labeled as reactive, whose story revealed a much deeper understanding.   Maya's first three families thought she was untrainable ... a hopeless menace.    "How bad could this dog's behavior really be, at only 7 months old" was Kathy’s first thought.    The problem? She relentlessly chased anything and everything that moved: kids, bikes, cars, cats. sheep, cows ... you name it ... if it moved, she chased it. There wasn’t a fence or a leash that contained her, so she basically terrorized families and neighborhoods everywhere she went.   In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy shares the inspiring story of her dog, Maya, illustrating the power of partnership and opening  your mind and your heart to deeply understanding your reactive dog.   Kathy reveals her strategies on how she worked with Maya to star

When you and your dog get stressed, there are some simple ways to manage this stress response.  For example,  did you know that how we breathe influences our brain in multiple ways?    Our breathing affects our perception, emotion, cognition, and even our mood. And breathing regulates arousal, attention, and stress responses…for both you and your dog.   In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy talks about the science of breathing, the importance of emotional contagion, and why coming back to balance is so important to our dogs.    Being out in nature is a proven way to manage stress and it reduces neural activity in the part of the brain associated with anxiety and depression. Kathy shares her personal experience that demonstrates just how powerful breathing and connecting to nature can be.     She includes her favorite breathing techniques that work really well to get calm, even after a meltdown when out on a walk with her dogs.   In this episode:    The science of our breathing style The emotional con

As dog moms, we are committed to keeping our dogs safe, calm and happy…but what about when someone does something  that  makes that really, really hard for us?   Loose dogs, fence running dogs, over-enthusiastic dogs, dogs that don’t give us enough space, and dogs that are allowed to be unruly and disrespectful in a way that challenges our dog … are all experiences that we are likely to encounter.   When those things happen, we have thoughts about that dog and their person, right? That’s normal. But, what if your thoughts initiate a reactivity spiral, and what if your thoughts are causing you and your dog to feel even worse than before?   We may not be able to control what other people (or their dogs) do … but we CAN get a grip on how we handle it.   In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy talks about the Thought Reframe Protocol that will rescue you from any of these situations with a few steps to follow.   She will also discuss in detail why you need to identify and decide to change your thoughts that

People need to deal with the feeling in the body for them to experience healing. If we're suppressing things, and distracting ourselves when we have that feeling in our body, then we can't heal. We're just actually running away from it.  This is part 2 of Kathy’s interview with Marika, an amazing dog trainer, one of her certified partnership coaches, and who loves to help dog moms in our community.   In this episode, Marika will help us understand the importance of letting our bodies feel in order to achieve healing and begin to heal the relationship with ourselves, which is the most important relationship we have.    Marika also talks about the effect of regular exercise on our bodies to allow us to feel a sense of peace and discusses some important details on our vagus nerve, which is our muscle that will help us to be more resilient when things get tough and the stress level gets high.    Learn more about Marika in her bio below.   Marika Bertram offers unique behavior and relationship consulting for dog

Stress can influence our experiences and success, and as a dog mom, it can also, in turn, affect our dogs and their behavior.    This episode of Enlightened by Dogs is the first part of the 2-part episode with Marika Bertram, who is an amazing dog trainer, one of my certified partnership coaches, and who loves to help dog moms in our community.    Marika shares her knowledge about stress, how to get stressed, and even how to deal with them. She also talks about the vagus nerve, some simple techniques that we could use to promote releasing that stress, and other important details on healing our reactivity loop.    In addition, Marika also discusses the importance of dealing with the feeling in our body, not just the thoughts that we have so that it doesn’t keep getting stored as trapped energy in the body and keep reappearing each time we're triggered.    Read more about Marika in her bio below.   Marika Bertram offers unique behavior and relationship consulting for dog families with a focus on holistic heart-

If you are a dog parent, you may be familiar with various ways to strengthen the bond between you and your dog and to establish a strong connection over time.    In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy dives into the value of gratitude and appreciation and shares different research studies that show evidence of the immense benefits of connecting heart-to-heart with your dogs.     Kathy talks about the important details of a study by the HeartMath Institute research team, a practice of the simple heart focus technique, and other relevant studies and shows their importance for you and your amazing four-legged furry friends.    In this episode:  The value of gratitude and appreciation The interconnection of all life forms through a rich tapestry of intersecting magnetic fields The immense benefits of connecting heart-to-heart with dogs   Quotes:   “Gratitude is such a powerful amplifier of heart, energy, and love. And it's one of the quickest ways to offset stress, and to lift our mood.”   “Gratitude mos

Kathy has formed connections with many dogs in a variety of ways.   But, in this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, she invites a special guest to explore a way of building bridges with our four-legged friends that you may have overlooked.  This is part 2 of Kathy’s interview with the wonderful Marianne Magin, an artist, dog mom and Dancing Hearts partnership coach.  In this part, she discusses how she helps people through their dog grief using her art, how she emotionally reacts to creating wonderful artwork for herself and others, and discusses her incredible card deck and children’s book!  Read more in her bio below.  Bio:  Marianne Magin is a dog mom, a human mom and an artist. She is inspired by dogs! And loves animals and nature and has always drawn and painted since she was a young girl. She is also a certified Dancing Hearts Partnership coach. She loves to connect with animals, especially dogs through her custom watercolor portrait work, as well as working in other media. She has written and illustrated

There are many ways to build strong connections with our dogs. Changing our behaviors, trying new experiences together and learning from our interactions with our dogs all help greatly.  But art is another incredible way to build a bridge between us and our dogs. And it can be a beautiful process!  This episode of Enlightened by Dogs is Part 1 of a 2-part episode with Marianne Magin, a wonderful artist, dog mom and certified Dancing Hearts Partnership coach who is hugely inspired by dogs and animals in her work.  She details how her art helps her and her clients build stronger connections between themselves and their beautiful four-legged friends.  Bio:  Marianne Magin is a dog mom, a human mom and an artist. She is inspired by dogs! And loves animals and nature and has always drawn and painted since she was a young girl. She is also a certified Dancing Hearts Partnership coach. She loves to connect with animals, especially dogs through her custom watercolor portrait work, as well as working in other media. S

Kathy has preached the power of brilliant partnership for many years and practiced it with her dogs. In that time, she’s learned how important it is to give dogs room to bloom.  In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Beth Williams, licensed physical therapist and certified Dancing Hearts Partnership Coach, joins to discuss why giving dogs room to bloom is crucial to being a great dog mom.  Kathy and Beth dive into the culture and expectations around giving dogs space, keeping them safe and the incredible international Yellow Dog Project.  She recommends checking your own emotions and judgement, acknowledging dogs that need extra space and respecting all dogs’ boundaries!  Here is Marianne’s poem, ‘All Dogs Look Good In Yellow’, featured in this episode:  All dogs look good in yellow.   All dogs want that grace.   All dogs appreciate us asking  Can we share your space?   Big dogs can want to cuddle.   But big dogs want space too.   Little dogs are just like big dogs  And medium dogs have the same view.   Fluf

A life with dogs isn’t always plain sailing. Kathy knows that first-hand. They can challenge your patience with their behaviors time and time again.  But, instead of working to outright fix those behaviors, it’s time to connect first.  In this Enlightened by Dogs episode, Kathy explains why connecting with your dogs, before anything else, makes magic happen.   She explores the benefits of digging beneath the surface to truly understand your dogs and why it’s OK to regret how you’ve dealt with their challenging behaviors in the past.  In this episode:  Making ‘connect first’ your mantra  Listening to your dog with compassion and curiosity  Why to stop focusing on correcting behaviors  Quotes:  “When we can dig under the surface for what's really going on with our dog. Well, that's when our life starts to change.”  “If we continue to look at our dogs as a series of behaviors to shape, we miss getting to know our dogs fully and we certainly miss connecting to our dogs fully.”  “Listening with compassion and

Dogs behave “badly” all the time…Kathy definitely knows this first-hand.   However, that “badness” doesn’t define our dogs. We live in a society where dogs are considered a set of behaviors rather than complex, sentient beings with emotions and social intelligence.   In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy explores the idea of “badness”. She explains how a brilliant partner mindset can help us reframe the way we consider our dog’s behaviors and create a life of compassion, connection and cooperation with our beloved companions.  In this episode:  Why all dogs are good dogs, regardless of their behavior  Interrupting and reframing our thoughts around “bad” behavior  Becoming a brilliant partner through compassion and curiosity  “When we embrace behaviorism as a dog mom, we end up seeing our dogs as a simple collection of behaviors, needing to be shaped, manipulated to suit our desires. This is instead of us considering our dog as a socially intelligent, emotionally rich sentient being who is in need

Kathy has heard so many amazing stories about dog moms’ journeys with their dogs. But with any dog comes challenges. Kathy’s guests have been no strangers to those!  Whether it’s barking at other dogs, going wild around food, pulling on the leash or being incredibly fearful, everyone has experienced setbacks – some common and some not so much.  In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy takes a look back at previous guest episodes and highlights how they’ve overcome challenges with their dogs.   No matter what your situation with your dog, it’s important to have hope!  In this episode:  Dealing with difficult situations with dogs  How to cope when you feel like giving up on your dog  Explaining The Premack Principle  Quotes:  “When I saw Dancing Hearts, I thought it sounds right up my alley. So I signed up for the free workshop and never looked back.”  “I thought about my dog: ‘Are we meant to be together?’. There were signs we were meant to be together. Now, she’s taught me so much about myself and I

Kathy has connected and cooperated with so many dogs over the years. It’s something that dog parents long for. We all want our dogs to feel safe, calm and happy. We want them to know that we have their backs. But how do you build that true connection and natural cooperation with your dogs? In this Enlightened by Dogs episode, Kathy explores the what, why and how of cooperation and connection. She explains how to nurture relationships through invitation and how it can enhance your relationships with your dogs. In this episode: Building a heart connection with your dog How to open the pathway to connection Giving your dog agency to accept or reject invitation Quotes: “Extending an invitation to our dog fulfils that deep social need to belong and to bond and to be a part of a family group.” “When we extend an invitation to another, the intention is that it’s an act of sharing love.” “Our dogs see us as loving leaders that will keep them safe, calm and happy and will have their backs.” Want More of Kathy? Bril

Kathy has spent so many years with so many dogs. They’ve all been wonderful. But they’ve all brought their own challenges. It’s so easy to look to the future, to a time when these challenges are solved, and everything is OK. But the only way to become a true, brilliant partner for your dog is to cultivate calm, confidence and happiness today. A dream life with your dog starts with you thinking like, feeling like and making the decisions of a brilliant partner. As Kathy says in this Enlightened by Dogs episode, a great relationship with a dog stems from their dog parent adopting a growth mindset. As soon as you stop blaming external factors for things that go wrong or look to the future in hope they’ll be solved, you can begin to become a compassionate, empathetic role model for your dog. In this episode: Building a dream life with your dog Dangers of a ‘cause-and-effect’ mindset for yourself and your dog How to stop blaming external factors when bad things happen Quotes: “Raising dogs in a way that nurtures

How do we become more deeply connected with our dogs? As Kathy explains, it’s when we step into our place as trustworthy role models and loving leaders. When we are able to do that, we and our dogs are safe, calm and happy – we are in the green zone – which is what we all want from our life with our dogs! As Kathy emphasizes in this episode of Enlightened By Dogs, we need to move away from the desensitized, counter conditioning mindset of dog training that is so our culture and focus on the human dog connection that inspires us to create legendary, enlightened partnerships. In this episode: What it means to grow and leak trust How we are biologically wired for connection Why it’s important to recognize when you start to move out of the green zone Quotes: “We’ve got to get out of this dog training, counter conditioning mindset that is pervasive in our culture.” “What greater joy is there than walking with your dog, enjoying nature. Watching your dog sniff and roll and see the light in their eyes and their to

Kathy has spent her life with so many wonderful dogs. Sadly, that means she’s experienced loss many times too. The grief that dog moms experience is often uncontrollable and makes us feel a confusing mixture of emotions from sadness to longing. But how do we deal with these feelings? How do we navigate the grief we feel when we lose our beloved dogs? In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy explains how she has dealt with grief after losing her companions over the years. Tune in to this episode as she explores her own overwhelming emotions and delves into insights from psychologists and grief experts. In this episode: Kathy’s experiences with grief over her dogs Advice from experts on grief How Kathy finds comfort in poetry Quotes: “When a person eventually adapts to a loss, grief is not over. It doesn't mean that we're sad for the rest of our lives. But it means that we adapt and that grief finds its place in our lives indefinitely, maybe forever.” “Dog moms truly understand the depth of loss, longing

When your dogs’ actions and responses don’t match your expectations, it can be so easy to obsess and worry about it. You could be struggling to deal with their on-leash reactivity, their behavior around other dogs, or their incessant barking at the neighbors. It can sometimes feel like these frustrations consume every ounce of you! Does any of this sound familiar? Kathy has experienced this first-hand and she has learned a few helpful techniques to get through it. In this episode of Enlightened by Dogs, Kathy explores how you can avoid stress, worry and obsession by letting go of expectation and approaching your dogs with love, curiosity and confidence. Tune in for expert advice on how to trust the process and stop ‘white knuckling’. In this episode: How to let go of expectations What allowed Kathy to let go and change her mindset Why you shouldn’t be desperate to achieve Quotes: “You will find joy right away if you give up some of those expectations and that need to control.” “In your relationship with you