The Fr. Mike Schmitz Catholic Podcast

How many real friends do you have? Honestly, many people we call friends would probably better qualify as pals or buddies. The first step to getting real friends is to recognize how we are all made to be gifts of love. God is love and we were made in his image. We were also made for community, because God is a community of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. Living out this love and community as God does requires availability and vulnerability. By availability we mean “care-free timelessness”, as Catholic evangelist Matthew Kelly calls it. By vulnerability we mean taking off the mask. This is the really hard part. As a missionary Fr. Mike knows once said, vulnerability is not just transparency. Transparency is letting someone look into the fish bowl. Vulnerability is inviting them into the fishbowl and letting them move things around. How can we all learn to grow in love, community, availability, and vulnerability so we can become real friends to others and live as the image of God in the world?

If you’re not feeling loved by someone you love, take courage in the story of Leah in Genesis. Jacob, Leah’s husband, did not love her. In fact, what’s even worse, he loved her sister, Rachel, instead. Leah named her first three sons out of her hope and desire for her husband to love her, thinking if she bore him sons he would love him. She named her first “Reuben” which means, “Look, a son,” saying, “Now my husband will love me.” She named her second son “Simeon” which means “listening” because she felt the Lord heard her prayer for Jacob to love her. She named her third son “Levi” which means “joined together” because she believed this time her husband will finally be joined to her. By the time she had her fourth son, she named him Judah, which means “may God be praised.” She finally stopped trying to make Jacob love her, and instead she let go and let God take over. It’s no coincidence that Jesus would be born from the line of Judah. Some people love people the way they know how to love, and the beloved j

Wearing masks, not wearing masks, and all the mixed emotions that have come with the coronavirus reveal that—as a society—we lack freedom from the fear of death. Maybe you know someone who has died from the virus, or someone who lost their livelihood due to the lockdown. Many are wondering when they can safely go out again, or when they can they go back to Mass. In fact, the coronavirus is revealing the fear of not just death, but also the fear of loss, uncertainty, and insecurity. In these strange times, it’s encouraging to remember the one who conquered death. In Hebrews we read: “Since therefore the children share in flesh and blood, he himself likewise partook of the same nature, that through death he might destroy him who has the power of death, that is, the devil, and deliver all those who through fear of death were subject to lifelong bondage” (Hebrews 2:14-15). In a world without Jesus, death ought to be feared because it is a separation from life and everything good. But Christ has transformed life

It may sound foolish to believe in a God who allows evil, tragedy, suffering, and disasters. But God never promised to rid the world of these things. He promised us hope: “and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us” (Romans 5:5). At some point we are going to experience heartbreak, loss, and suffering. Anyone who thought having faith in God would take away those things in life had the wrong idea of who God is. Fr. Mike says he has never been disappointed in God, because he knows what promises God did make. God is faithful. He will never break his promises, but he never promised that you would not experience grief. He did promise that in the midst of the pain he will be there. In being there, he will help you to love the giver of peace more than the gift of peace. Discipleship is a daily cross. God promised trouble, not peace. He encouraged us to take heart in the midst of that trouble, and that’s how we grow stronger an

We all have pet peeves. We all get annoyed by things that really don’t matter much, whether it’s someone chewing with their mouth open, or someone whispering the Rosary in an Adoration chapel—which are two things that used to be pet peeves for Fr. Mike. But he learned a better way to deal with annoyances. Why do we get so annoyed by such petty things? It’s because being annoyed is a choice. Fr. Mike tells a quick story about prisoners of war in Vietnam. They were put in a really small cell where they were so close together they had to sleep touching each other. The prisoners came to an agreement that if they were annoyed by something another prisoner does, the one who is annoyed is the one at fault. This helped them rise about their situation. There are four possible choices when you’re annoyed: I can choose to be annoyed. This is not recommended. I can actively choose to rise above the annoyance and grow in patience. I can do something about it and let it move me to positive action. Instead of saying that p

Is your faith certain enough to stand up against the doubts and different ideas out there? Fr. Mike shares insight about certainty from Dr. Montague Brown, professor of philosophy at St. Anselm College, New Hampshire. Dr. Brown says certainty is intellectual belief based off the evidence. It’s not blind belief. Someone with certainty is not going to change their mind without new objective evidence. Many times people change their mind not because of new evidence, but just because of new people in their lives. They’ve simply been exposed to new behavior. This happens to students in college quite often. Christianity is evidential. It hinges upon an indisputable event, the life and death of Jesus. If you’re from a small town, you may think the way you were raised is just part of your small town’s way of thinking, and that a well-known university in a big city must have a broader, more enlightened way of thinking. But really, the university is just as subject to its way of thinking as the small town is. The cultu

Fr. Mike recalls the speed math tests he took in second and third grade. He finished them in decent time, but his cousin—who was in the same class—finished them way faster. In fact, his cousin was the fastest in his class. For some reason this led Fr. Mike to believe he simply wasn’t good at math. When it came to “speak and spell” though, Fr. Mike did really well. This led him to believe he was really good with words. He was acting under the common belief that someone is either good at something or bad at something. In Carol S. Dweck’s book, Mindset, she speaks of fixed mindsets—like Fr. Mike had— and growth mindsets, which challenge us to grow. Fr. Mike shares the findings of a study that observed two groups of children. The first group was given tests and were told “You’re really smart” when they finished them. The second group was told “You really worked hard on that.” When the tests got harder, the first group started giving up, but the latter group doubled down and rose to the challenge. God works with

If you want to know how to share the gospel, it’s important to have the love and courage to not just give answers and corrections, but to ask questions. It is in asking questions from the heart that you convey true interest in the person’s soul, instead of just trying to convince the person you’re right. Fr. Mike tells of a time when a student came to him saying he tries to evangelize, but just gets shut down. He tried to tell his good friend that he shouldn’t be over-drinking, and this just made his friend mad. Fr. Mike told this student, that’s not evangelization. That’s correction. A good friend or pastor, depending on the relationship, may be in a position to offer correction to those they love. But evangelizing is a different conversation. Evangelization is introducing Christ to others. That’s why Fr. Mike suggests asking questions when trying to introduce Christ to someone, because questions are a natural part of two people getting to know each other. If you are being Christ to someone, by asking them q

In the spiritual life, it’s difficult to know whether striving to do God’s will or just abiding in him is better. But why can’t we do both? Fr. Mike tells the story of a perpetually active student athlete. His inability to disengage in doing things and just abide in God was a problem, and he knew it. Fr. Mike advised him, it’s not that abiding is right and striving is wrong. It’s important to do, but it’s important to also know what not to do in order to acquire the goal your living for. There are many reasons why we choose to commit to activities, whether it’s for fear of missing out, liking being needed, needing to be liked. The list goes on. But if I find myself unable to rest, do I have a clear vision of what I really want out of life? Being slightly engaged and not knowing what you’re striving for can be more exhausting than being fully engaged while knowing what you’re striving for. It’s important to know when, where, and how I need rest, to know when to just abide in God, like Mary and not Martha (se

Rigidity and laxity are difficult obstacles to avoid when trying to find balance in your faith life. When we treat Christianity as a project, that leads to rigidity. When we treat Christianity like a projection, that leads to laxity. If you’re just looking at what Christians are supposed to do and then following those instructions, you’re treating your faith like a project and that’s bound to make you rigid. At the other extreme, if you see Jesus as a softy or a buddy who’s going to look the other way when you do the wrong thing, that’s just your projection of who he is. This mentality is bound to make you lax. How do we escape these two extremes? Here’s an analogy from Fr. Mike. When a pilot gets ready to fly a plane, he has a certain trust that the plane will fly, but he still has to check that everything is working properly before taking off. Also, he still has to check the controls even as he is flying and putting his life in the plane’s hands. There is a symbiotic balance between trust and diligence her

Making small sacrifices is not just for Lent, because sacrifices and penance are necessary. As Christ said: “If any man would come after me, let him deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me” (Luke 9:23). And this is true all year long. But when Jesus said to deny yourself, he didn’t mean to always go against what you want. Really. He meant there are things I want that will not make me more like him—a lot of things, actually. So following him often means dying to self by denying myself those things. Mortifications—little deaths to self—make us more like Jesus and can be offered up for the sanctification of the world and others. Mortification can come in many different forms. It’s not always denying yourself something you want. Sometimes it means doing something you don’t want. Sloth or greed can cause us to not do things we should do. Choosing not to be slothful or greedy often means doing something for someone else—and this is a little death to self. Love is the not-so-secret ingredient that hel

Fr. Mike explains how being at home with our family is one of God’s favorite ways to make us holy—if we are honest about the areas where we need to grow in our relationships with family members. Fr. Mike has observed that college students often have a profound encounter with Jesus through their college’s Catholic community. They find that they are praying more, receiving the sacraments more, participating in more service opportunities, and so on. Then they get back home for Thanksgiving, Christmas, or—in the most recent cases—a lockdown. They realize, in their interactions with their family that they’re not as holy as they thought they were. Why do we struggle to be loving toward those whom we claim to love the most? It’s harder to love family members sometimes because—Fr. Mike explains—you didn’t get to choose this group, and they can make demands on you. It’s easy to be generous when it’s on your own terms. Our relationships with our family can reveal the impatience and lack of generosity inside us—the un

In today’s special podcast, Fr. Mike Schmitz sits down with Fr. Josh Johnson to discuss racial division in the Church and how Catholics can strive to restore unity in the Body of Christ. Fr. Josh emphasizes that he is not infallible, so it’s okay to disagree with anything he says that doesn’t lead you closer to Christ, but he hopes this conversation bears fruit in your walk with Jesus and within the body of Christ. Many members of the Church want to know what they can do during these turbulent times. Fr. Josh gives four practical pieces of advice: listen to learn, use specific language when speaking with each other, act as one Body in Christ, and join in the suffering of Jesus to make reparation for others’ sins. For full shownotes, please go to AscensionPress.com/FrMikePodcast Special Guest: Fr. Josh Johnson.

Throughout the Gospels Jesus says, “Remain in me” or “abide in me,” which—in simplified terms—means whatever you do, invite Jesus along. Ask him to “come with.” This is a way to grow in your relationship with him, but it’s also a smart thing to do because, after all, Jesus said: “I am the vine, you are the branches. He who abides in me, and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing” (John 15:5). When we ask someone to “come with” or “go with”, as Fr. Mike says they do in Minnesota, we are implying that we enjoy their company and even have a certain kind of love for them. When you love someone, you want them to come with you wherever you go. But “remain in me” means more than that. It also means gaze upon Jesus, not just at his face in a religious icon—though that could help—but gaze upon him with the interior gaze of the heart. Be aware that he is present. This shouldn’t be burdensome. It’s simple. Spending time with one you love is as easy as doing nothing. Thirdly, rema

When someone says something hurtful to you, it is wise to give them the benefit of the doubt. What does that mean? It means ask yourself, “Do I firmly believe that this is a person of good will?” If so, is there anything that can help you better understand their behavior? Give them the benefit of the doubt that they are just tired, or “hangry”, or having a bad day for some reason. Especially in marital relationships, think of how many times your spouse has said hurtful things to you, while you knew that they still loved you. This is not to excuse hurtful behavior, and not a reason to tolerate being treated poorly, or to endure any kind of abuse. In many cases a person’s actions do reveal their heart. So we’re not talking about those cases. We’re not talking about people who manipulate others intentionally, and those who just willfully do evil. We’re talking about when people of good will just have a bad moment, or momentarily let their vain side get the best of them. The way we respond to an enemy and the wa

You know you should be praying. But do you ever wish someone would show you how? Fr. Mike starts by showing us how to pray with the Bible with a time-honored method called lectio divina. For full shownotes, please go to: https://bit.ly/2WYdL5F Monday, May 18 at 8 PM ET, Father Mike will answer your questions LIVE, for the first time ever on Ascension Presents! Whether your question is about why Catholics do the weird things they do, how you can overcome a specific challenge, or what Father’s favorite meal is, tune into the Ascension Presents YouTube channel to ask Father Mike live! https://bit.ly/2WUs1wp

Vanity is not what many people think it is. It can come in many forms, and is not necessarily an infatuation with yourself. Vanity is an inordinate preoccupation with what other people think about you—which is different. It’s important, to an extent, to care what others think about you. It can even be charitable. But when this care becomes unbalanced, it leads to neglecting more important things. Wanting to be noticed can be vain, but not wanting to be noticed can also be vain. When you shrink back and don’t want anyone to look at you, it can be a form of vanity or false humility; because not wanting to be seen can be an indication that you care an inordinate amount about what people think of you. Vanity can also cause an unwillingness to share the Faith. Many times we think sharing the gospel will make people think less of us. How many times has the thought of what other people think prevented you from sharing the Faith? Balance is pertinent in every aspect of vanity, and the best way to achieve that balan

In a previous episode, Fr. Mike said that all Catholics grow in the same “soil” together, but the fruit we bear is unique. But what is this common soil? What are the essentials for every Catholic Christian? “And they devoted themselves to the apostles’ teaching and fellowship, to the breaking of bread and the prayers.” So there are four elements in the soil: Teachings of the Apostles: Magisterial teaching of the Church, Sacred Scripture, and Tradition. Communal Life (Fellowship): It’s not just me praying to Jesus. We need to share life somehow. Breaking of the Bread: This refers to the Mass, not just eating together. Prayer: There are so many ways to pray as a Catholic, and so many awesome prayers. You can pray the Liturgy of the Hours with the Church, or in your own words, or both. But to be in the soil you have to pray. For a great Liturgy of the Hours app, check out iBreviary. God wants us to flourish in faith, hope, and love for him and for others. He is the one who makes us grow in holiness, but in orde

Fr. Mike talks about how to navigate discussions with your partner about sexual sin—whether it’s pornography, masturbation, or other impurity. It’s important to realize that sometimes a person doesn’t have a right to know everything about you immediately. Keeping this in mind, at what point does a couple have to be vulnerable about their sexual sins? After two months of dating, maybe six months? It’s quite possible—actually likely—that a person’s sexual sins are the most shameful part of his or her life, so when someone is not exposing those sins—no matter how long the couple has been together—it may just be that the person is not comfortable being that vulnerable with their partner yet. A person has a right to be hurt and mad if their partner is not revealing their sexual sins, but he or she should also ask if they had a right to that knowledge. Father Mike asserts that such knowledge doesn’t have to result in the end of the relationship. Once the sin has been revealed, it should stay revealed. Neither part

Fr. Mike makes the case that, before you claim a certain “style” in practicing the faith, you have to master the basics. He tells a story about when he was learning guitar. The teacher told his students to hold their guitar on an angle with their left knee higher than their right. This way they could play all kinds of music. Some of the students decided they wanted to hold the guitar their own way. This limited what they could play. Living the Faith is the same way. If you’re told to do something and don’t, is it because you can’t do it, or because you won’t? When practicing the Faith, you may say you’re not into prayer, or service, or witnessing about Jesus, but all these things are essential to growing in holiness. The saints are all different, true. Their fruit was unique, but the soil where they flourished is the same. Every saint started with prayer. They all did service, they all talked about Jesus. Fr. Mike recommends that we take advantage of all the riches our Catholic Faith gives us: the Rosary, Ig