The Tom Barnard Show

Did you know that Pat Boone did a song about Speedy Gonzales? We thought about it because Sofia's last name is also Gonzales. We are unaware of any popular cartoon characters named Mustillo, so that didn't come up. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Did you know that in 2012, New Jersey had the most billionaires per capita? That may no longer be true; things change. And speaking of things changing, maybe don't Google what Jim's been up to since he was on our show. Feel free to look up DDP though, because while he's no longer in the ring, his yoga program hasn't gone anywhere. Like, in a good way. It hasn't left. You know what I mean. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

This episode marks the first time Costaki was a regular on our show, which is pretty cool. Less cool is infiltrating drug rings and pretending to be one of them, knowing that a single slip-up could mean a brutal death. Unless you're into that sort of thing, I guess. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Every so often, a movie that's so weird it defies explanation comes out. Death of a Unicorn is one such movie. Whether the Minecraft movies turns out the same way remains to be seen. Mike Lindell is less concerned with weird movies and more concerned with the deep state, which sounds like something from a movie but sadly, it is not. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you want to watch Minnesota sports, prepare to jump through some hoops. You can watch them some places out of state, some places in state, and none of them are cheap. Also every team has their own special place, all with a different monthly fee of course. Now if you want to watch the same Disney movies over and over, you're in luck. Pick a movie, wait a week, and they'll remake it. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Have you ever wanted to suddenly become very tall, like in the hit film Like Mike? Well before you rub that magic lamp, think twice. Sure, you might get a deal with the NBA, but getting into small cars already sucks. Do you really want to be even more uncomfortable on road trips? Plus if it's a Tesla someone's going to throw a molotov at you, and if you're very tall you might get hit right in the face. Talk about a bad day. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you think about it, shooting a sex scene is weird. If you actually get into it, then that's wrong, because it's supposed to be pretend. But you have to seem like you're into it, and you have to be convincing enough to fool an audience. But you can't be too convincing, because then people might think you're a pervert. That's why instead of the wide world of intimacy coordination, Cassie chose to get into something simpler, like analyzing cases where ghosts produced evidence in their own murder trials. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Those Libertarians have some pretty wacky ideas. Drug store heroin. Personal nukes. Smaller government. Okay, some of their ideas are pretty good. That's all Mary was saying. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

If you've listened to our show for any length of time, you've heard us talk about Acme. It's a mysterious place. Or at least it was, until Patrick wrote a book about it called Home Club. Learn everything you ever wanted to know about Acme, then go break and arrow on your neck. If Mike Bryant can do it, so can you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A new record has been broken after over 80 years: the longest Oscars acceptance speech ever. He wasn't exactly polite about it either. Nor was Walz polite about apparently being too scary for Republicans to handle. I guess that's part of what makes him so intimidating. That and his skills at auto repair. Very scary stuff. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In a stunning upset, Costaki made a surprise appearance on the show today to talk about how much money sports teams are worth. It's quite a bit, if you weren't aware. Even the least valuable ones are still nearing the billion dollar mark. The only other easy way to make that much money is to defraud the Minnesota government, and even then you might end up facing consequences eventually. Maybe. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Swatting continues to be the topic of the month, and we happen to have a regular who got sent out on a couple of them. Hear the story from the other side. He's almost as unhappy about it as the victims are. And both are almost as unhappy about being swatted as they are being beholden to Minnesota sports. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What was the first good scripted TV show? The answer just might be I Love Lucy. That was 74 years ago, which is a very long time for those of you keeping track. 3/4ths of a century of television out to keep you occupied for a couple lifetimes. And speaking of a century, the Twins are coming up on 125 years, only a couple of them which were actually good. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Swatting is all the rage these days. If you haven't heard of it, it's basically tricking the cops into maybe shooting someone. Fun, right? If that sounds a little intense to you, why not try a cruise instead? It takes something like seven years to sail the seas out to Hawaii, so you'll have plenty of time to relax. Plus the SWAT teams can't reach you in international waters. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

They say art is subjective. That's wrong. Sometimes, art is simply bad. The new MLB hats are a great example of that. They're ugly, they make no sense, and surprisingly frequently, they're profane. That's why you should buy one of our hats instead. No profanity to be found. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Dental surgery is no fun at all. You can't talk, you can't chew, and you don't even get to sleep through it like regular surgery. Although with all the new TV shows everyone is watching, you might not want to sleep anyway. Especially with Kristyn's mysterious debut on ABC news. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

What makes someone royalty? Calling themselves so and being uncontested, that's what. That's why we're all kings, queens, dukes, and maybe a count here and there. Unfortunately our studio isn't very much territory, so the king of England and his new podcast have us beat in terms of sheer royal-ness. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

A case of hantavirus. A rap about monkeys. Nerve damage. Today is nothing if packed with intrigue. And if that's not enough, an NFL player is making poverty wages. Well, okay, he's making over a million a year, but still. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Football season is over, which means Costaki is free to roam the land once more. This week he's roaming his way up to Minnesota at Acme and making a pit stop in studio to visit us. Tom and Kathryn aren't here in person, continuing a 12 year tradition of Costaki rarely, if ever, meeting them face to face. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Get off social media. Well, wait, hold on. Stay on social media, but only to check for updates on our page. Aside from that, you don't need it. It's addictive, it's stressful, and do you really care when someone you haven't seen since high school goes to Europe? Be honest. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices