Lords Of Loud

In the season finale as anticipation builds to fever pitch, Lord Ben finally blesses us with his Top 10 Albums of all time. The other Lords, thinking they have his measure decide to run a bingo competition on the side. Also: Lord Kev has a crack at Turn the Page by flipping through an old Post magazine, potentially saving the segment from being boned next season.

What can you say about Lord Al’s closet that hasn’t already been said? Better yet, are his musical choices better left unsaid? The Lords debate this topic once again and also give props to the hidden King/Queen of Rock ‘n’ Roll, d-d-be-bop-a-bop: the bassline.

Ben misses the brief! Brief missed by Ben. Ben = not brief. Lord Ben: brief; missed. In other news lots of top songs about The Devil and the letter T. The evil theme also leads us into a song-stealing frenzy. As always there are no real winners, just four losers. Also, the good vibes return with another set of fave TV themes: 1 banana, 2 banana, 3 banana, 4!

The world was still reeling from the impact of Windows 95 and the introduction of Sabrina the Teenage Witch when 1997 appeared on the doorstep. Remember getting’ jiggy with it to the Spicestein classic “Du Wannabe”? Us neither. But it would’ve been pretty fly, yeah? Also in this episode, Kev challenges the Lords to string it together between 90s icons Deee-Lite and Marky Mark.

Seems the complex concept of 'Your Top 10 Albums' is harder to grasp than you'd think. This week it's Lord Kev's effort and he completely forgets (a) all but two of the decades of popular music, (b) to put his albums in any kind of order, and (c) a whole stack of the acts he says he loves. Points for trying. Also: "Nobody does it better" you say? Another round of our favourite covers ... and Tainted Love.

What’s creepier than the film clip for Michael Jackson’s “The way you make me feel”? The Lords’ Halloween Special! Don your mask and grab your broomstick while the Lords hand out the treats.Lord Kev also turns out his pockets to reveal a bunch of obscure bands. The other lords respond: Again?

Been a long time since Lord Al dragged a half-baked discussion topic out his rusty oven. Some might say: not long enough! Undaunted, the Lords pick tracks by word association to the famous classification terms, and reveal more of their busted psyches than you ever wanted to know. Also: our favourite movie theme songs. Let us know yours!

The Lords polish up the disco ball and head back to 1979. Perhaps it was all the static electricity in the polyester shirts, perhaps the impending flicking of the calendar into the high-octane 80s, but it was a charged and turbulent time for music. Also: the Lords ride the white pony down to the corner of Drugs St and Music Ave.

The Lords dissect the decades of ill will between two blokes who never took a bridge over any troubled water. Will they ever graduate from the sounds of silence? Can we really blame Tom and Jerry or were ridiculous surnames the real issue? We then brave the dusty corners of Al's closet yet again. What in prog's name is the nature boy making us listen to now?

The great puzzle is how this episode isn’t chock full of Led Zeppelin. The Lords all slap their meatiest riffs on the table and wield air guitars to honour the gods of rock. Kev even whips out a fuzzy Scottish python. Oo-er! Also: Lord Ben flicks through an ancient tome to reveal that there are more than two Beatles.

The Lords make the mistake of asking Lord Al to pick his top 10 albums. He reveals a brazen lack of certitude that leaves the other Lords wondering how he manages to choose matching socks each day. Also: Lord Brett lays down a challenge to find the connection between the M.O.R. Prince and the sexily funky Phil Collins.

The Lords carve up the musical goose to debate the golden eggs they find. Some are wildly different, some a little older, and one or two are more mellow than you might expect. Listen out for a pigeon on wine and Brett inspiring the first recorded mic drop. Also: were some of your favourite acts actually just 'a phase'? The usual suspects are lined up and a few old favourites are sent down. Time to chuck out the eyeliner!

Strap on your TARDIS and lace up your DeLoreans, the Lords are going back in time! They visit 1984 to bask in the awesomeness of music before Auto-Tune. Being Father’s Day in Australia, they also reminisce about the music beloved of their dads - those dudes who were actually, like, completely grown adults even at the start of the '80s. Whoa!

Isn't recorded music great? You put your heart of glass into creating a classic and someone else makes a million. Even worse: a far better song. Some covers are genuine replicas, some complete reworks; some a surprise to the listener ... and some covers are never uncovered. A select few completely replace the original. The Lords dive under the covers to find the tropes and fall out over their favourites. There were four in the bed and the little one said 'Tori Amos'?!  This week in 'Turn the Page' Lord Ben flips through one of his old music rags for a flashback that includes Nik Kershaw's comeback and a digital camera the size of his head.

The year: 2056. The robotic uprising of the mid-30s was successful, ushering in a new age of peace, efficiency and the transmutation of humans into computer food. The A.I. music generated in the 20s was for fools – we now create epic masterpieces of white noise to make your motherboards get nasty on the dance floor. Sorry, Dave. Also: get your gloves ready, the lords have more hidden gems to share!

Finally, the episode nobody asked for! Lord Brett lays his cards on the table to show off his favourite albums. Who knew a pack of cards held so many jokers? Also: the Lords compare notes on Lord Kev’s tutorial on shoegazing.

Epic Episode Alert! After standard segments 'Album of the Week' and 'Episode Sponsor', the Lords slip on their rose-tinted spectacles and look back in anger and some confusion at our favourite moments from the first 50 episodes. Top quotes, rants and a disturbing and relentless swimwear debate ensue. This anniversary episode is further graced with a heartwarming tribute to Dusty Turner, the pioneer of geometry-based bluegrass. Enjoy gems like 'Fraction of my Heart' and 'Wackin' the Weasel'. There are prizes given away and shameless plugs for the phenomenal BC5 Creative and Zip Studios. We also take the time to explain/destroy each of the other Lords. What's really in Lord Al's heart? What's Brett's hair doing now? Can Lord Ben survive on a diet of Bread and Meat Loaf? Why is Kev wearing Doc Martens down the pool? We wind up looking at the top albums from 50 years ago. Hope you enjoy the anniversary special. Thanks for listening and don't forget to check out our Instant Gran page : )  

Join Lord Kev as he rests his weary spirit upon the slightly damp and musty inner sole of shoegaze music. Tighten up your laces and dip your head towards your effects pedals, but just remember that you can’t spit-shine a pair of suede shoes.

Another interesting brief from Lord Ben is misinterpreted, misunderstood, twisted and outright ignored by the Lords, who are clearly struggling in isolation. Among scattered attempts to name musicians who never got the credit they deserved, Lord Brett names an entire band (and it's not even 'The' Shadows), Lord Kev decides the category is just 'everyone else in ...', and Lord Al declares one leading artist is his own shadow, but then totally redeems himself in identifying the 'earlobe' of The Small Faces. Before the episode implodes, certain individuals of course find time to talk about how great the Beatles were, and put the boot into Floyd and Zeppelin.

Once you strip away the showmanship, the mythology and the sex appeal from popular music, what have you got? Aside from the Lords of Loud, you possibly have a whole bunch of bad singers. In this episode, some low-hanging fruits are picked, some barrel-bound fish are shot, and some sacred cows are branded.