Kate, Tim & Marty

Today’s show was wild. We met a bloke who got fined for pretending to be a ghost in a cemetery, then got stuck into Trump’s so-called “athlete” body stats that make Hemsworth look lazy. Ricki, Blackers and Joel sized each other up for Below Deck casting (spoiler: no one’s surviving), and The Glossys were full of chaos from Kim K roasting psychics to Ariana’s “inconclusive” kissing. Plus, the team tested their ears with misheard lyrics and found out Aussies love a live gig more than just about anything else.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The crew imagine life at sea as Below Deck opens casting calls — and things get messy fast. Ricky’s bossing the deck as bosun, Joel’s folding laundry in tears, and Blackers is just happy to play with the water toys. Plus, the gang roast each other’s work ethic, rank each other’s stew skills, and debate who’d actually last a day under Captain Sandy.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The phones went off today when a cop called in to set the record straight. Turns out, back in the day, you could sip a beer while driving in Melbourne as long as you were under the limit. Chaos. From there, it was all downhill... ghost stories in cemeteries, fines for peeing in public, and one listener who flipped off a speed camera and copped a $700 bill for the trouble. Plus, Rikki’s PVC plans for Gaga, Joel’s hook turn confession, and Blackers learning the hard way what a “nanny state” really is.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A wild ride of a show today! We discovered Miss Chile’s hidden Screamo talent (and Jermaine's fear of octopus), learned that Mariah Carey’s chef is slinging pizza in Bondi, and watched karma serve a Lamborghini driver instant justice. The Glossys had everything from Taylor’s alleged bridesmaid list to Orlando Bloom’s awkward Halloween and Liam Gallagher quitting the Gary Baldies. Plus, a Guinness record for world’s biggest mouth gape, a shoe mistaken for art, and one very controversial Blue Blob.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Taylor Swift’s bridesmaids list has apparently leaked and the team cannot cope. Blackers swears he's got insider WhatsApp access. Between the alleged guest list (hi Gigi and Selena) and talk of a Euro summer wedding, the speculation is wild. See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Miss Chile’s gone viral for belting out full-blown Screamo in the Miss World talent round, and we can’t look away.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ricki’s 40th birthday bash was massive, with celeb messages flooding in—including a few surprises that got everyone giggling. Blackers led a touching tribute to the late, great John Laws, sharing stories, audio gold and a bit of Lawsy wisdom. Then it was into the Mailbag, where Joel’s Neighbours career got a deep dive—stalker plots, wedding fails and all. What a show.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Today, we paused the birthday chaos to honour a true radio legend, John Laws. Blackers shared stories from his wild turkey hangover days with Lawsy and that iconic moment they spent together before his final 2SM show. Ricki and Joel looked back at his razor-sharp wit, famous feuds, and that golden voice that defined Aussie radio for seven decades. The man taught us all one thing—just listen.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joel’s Neighbours career gets a forensic rewatch from fans after he reveals his character was a “money-laundering stalker turned wedding planner” — and Ricki-Lee vows to binge every episode. The team even go full Powerball mode listing Joel’s exact episode numbers while discovering the “Just Watch” app mid-chat. Then it turns into a 40th birthday love fest: Joel gifts Ricki-Lee a flirty sat-nav message from her car (“you know how to drive me crazy”)See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

We found out the Louvre’s super-secret security password, and honestly, it’s so bad it could’ve been guessed by a toddler. Then there’s Amazon, who’s stirred up chaos by mixing Easter with Christmas for a Hot Cross Pudding you didn’t know you needed. We also copped the scoop on a free ARIA-themed ice cream pop-up with flavours inspired by Aussie music legends (Troye-Senberry Sivan, anyone?). Kim Kardashian’s new legal drama got roasted harder than a Bunnings snag, and to top it all off, we dove into the wildest story of the day: a marriage ruined by a too big package. You’ll never look at Coke cans the same way again.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

A TikToker has revealed her marriage ended because her husband’s “package” was literally too big to handle. We’re talking two Coke cans stacked on top of each other big.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

The Louvre’s been caught using one of the dumbest passwords in history, and we cannot stop laughing about it. Turns out, the world’s most famous art museum was hacked because their password was literally… Louvre.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Gordon Ramsey’s dishing out restaurant warnings – avoid “famous” menus, skip overstuffed burgers, and maybe even question your starter. Dorit Kemsley landed in Melbourne and gave us an Aussie radio exclusive, revealing her epic Vic Beckham fits, her ultra-specific cocktail order (“cemetery of carcasses”) and trying (sort of) an Aussie accent on the barbie. Jelly Roll nearly got treated like a criminal at Sydney Louis Vuitton. In The Glossys, Sia hosted Kathy Griffin’s birthday with a cheeky bathroom-adjacent seating plan, Meghan Markle’s back in acting, Khloé is over the Skims thong drama, and NSYNC can’t agree on their movie. Joel threw down a Lego flower challenge, and Ricki had strong opinions on Scooter Braun’s gross shoes while Sydney Sweeney smooches in NYC.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Shaboozey popped in for a chaotic game of Quick Draw with Ricky and Blackers — and he came in hot, talking mics, Woodford and Coke, and why the Wild West would’ve been his era. Things got rowdy fast as he tried to take Ricky down, but she wasn’t backing off (and definitely wasn’t staying seated). Between Jelly Roll shoutouts and arguments about whether “bourbon” is a capital city, this one’s pure cowboy chaos.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Joel landed an Aussie radio exclusive with Dorit Kemsley while she was in Melbourne for Crown Oak’s Day. She raved about Melbourne, Crown’s spa (best massage in 20 years) and described Aussie fashion as “effortlessly chic” while firmly ruling out culottes and Birkenstocks. Dorit shared how she’s archiving designer pieces for her daughter Phoenix, her famously exact drink orders, and reflected on last season of Housewives as “authentic chess.” She also teased her upcoming book (April 7), revealed she was a breakdancer back in the day, and dished on her love of music, running late, and keeping it glam.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

This week on Four The Record: Joe explains why the coalition is so obsessed with net-zero and why Albo is not helping our sportsbet accounts.  LINKS Follow Tim Blackwell on Instagram Follow Joe Hildebrand on Instagram Read Joe's column in The Daily Telegraph Listen to The Real Story With Joe Hildebrand  See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Jonathan Bailey’s officially the Sexiest Man Alive, but it’s his Lego obsession that’s really turning heads. We unpack his perfect date night and dealbreakers (hint: anti-Lego people need not apply). Ricki tells a wild story from her Brisbane trip that sounds almost too crazy to be true, and in the Glossys, Cynthia Erivo proves she’s built different by smashing a half marathon before doing two Broadway shows in one day. Unreal.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Tom Brady’s gone full sci-fi and cloned his beloved dog. Yep, Junie is an exact replica of his late pup, Lua. We’re shook. Meanwhile, Taylor Swift’s rocking mushroom boots, Sydney Sweeney’s back defending her jeans, and David Beckham’s officially a Sir. Oh, and Posh? She’s now Lady Beckham. Classy stuff all around.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Ricki had a night in Brisbane that sounds totally made up. Picture this: a few too many bubbles, a fancy bar above a pub, and then an in-restaurant dining experience at Macca’s. But the real chaos hit when a random bloke, clearly off his chops, shouted “whoa whoa” from across Queen Street Mall… yep, Raining Diamonds style. Ricki sang back, he bolted, and somehow Brisbane turned into her own live concert.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

It’s a wild mix today, betch. We meet the woman who got 5 kilos of French butter as a push present (yep, actual butter), and hear Lauren Spencer Smith’s stunning One Direction cover. Blackers puts everyone through a sonic showdown with the Startup Game, where things get... unexpectedly saucy. In the Glossys, Deborra-Lee’s planning a tell-all, Chris Martin’s dating Sophie Turner, and Diplo’s still dropping Trudeau jokes. Plus, a gold toilet worth $15 million and a marathon that somehow turned into speed dating.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.