Spanish Practices

Day fifty eight. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today Bombs and Bonfires Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 58 Bombs and Bonfires   It is Day 58 of our Spanish Lockdown, and what a miserable wet day it has been, chilly too. It is quite annoying that the UK is enjoying good weather and we have had, well really quite British weather.   A few days ago, we had a massive fire along the vega – the reed beds between Salobreña and Motril, destroying many acres of natural wild habitat.  It looks like it was started by yet another bonfire that got out of control.   Several times a year we suffer from bonfires that are uncontrolled, burning whole sides of beautiful rugged mountain landscape, destroying acres of plains,  leaving a blackened scorched waste.   Here between certain months of the year you are allowed to burn agricultural rubbish, leaves and the like, although judging by the acrid black smoke sometimes, the odd bit of plasti

Day fifty seven. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today Railway Children and Sewers Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 57   It is day 57 of our Spanish Lockdown and the cold wind has returned and is blowing everything around, making the dogs bark and giving the usually mild-mannered Mediterranean Sea white horses.   I do love being by the sea, everyday it is different, different colours, from proper Med Blue down to slate grey, most days, even in Lockdown there are ships out at sea to watch.  From tiny trawlers to big container ships on the far horizon.   We also get from time to time dolphins coming to play and eat fish, so this is a special place only marred by the poo bloom.  The Mayor of Salobreña just refers to it as the ‘El bloom’ a line of scummy water that makes its way around the coast from Nerja to Salobreña, ending up on the beach.   The bloom is caused by the town of Nerja pumping raw sewerage into the sea.  You ar

Day fifty six. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today Churchill and Porn Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 56   It is Day 56 of our Spanish Lockdown and the Mayor of Motril is mad, not in the crazy, dribbling eye swivelling sense, although she might be also doing that too.   She is mad at the national Government for setting out the criteria for allowing a Health Area to move to Phase 1 and then changing the rules at the last minute, but only for Granada and the Malaga area.   She has asked for a written explanation as to why they have done this? Many of the businesses that have prepared to open on Monday, now cannot.   One restaurant along the coast in La Herradura - “Bambu” had spent time and money flattening out the beach, laying their tables out at 2.5 metre spaces, putting in sanitation, buying food and bringing back four of their workers from Furlough.   Understandably the owner Darío de Haro is a little pissed off.  One

Day fifty five. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today The Pain in Spain. Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 55 - The Pain in Spain It is day 55 of our Spanish Lockdown and Uncle Pedro has succeeded in shattering the country into tiny pieces. Some parts will move forward to phase 1 including the Basque region which jumps to moving between provinces too, I am sure it has nothing to do with the support that the Spanish Prime Minister needs from the Basque Party. We will stay in lockdown phase zero.  Despite our local health area coming up to the criteria of phase 1 we have been lumped together with the city of Granada and so our lockdown continues. It is interesting a similar province like Valencia has been allowed to split into its health authority areas and not us.  I think the reason is that the government are frightened that if they open up the coastline of the Costa del Sol and the Costa Tropical, where we live.  There will

Day fifty four. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today naked women and fireworks. Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 54 Naked women and fireworks It is day 54 of our Spanish Lockdown.  Victory in Europe day.  Last night there was an enormous fire that stretched along the coastline between Motril and Salobreña.  The reed beds were alight, and the fire raged most of the night. It was finally put out at 10.30 in the morning. Weirdly it must have been reminiscent of watching the buildings of London burning in the distance after an air raid.  When I think about my grandparents and my mother, father and stepfather, they all went through an awful lot but the war did eventually end. When the war came to an end the street where my mother lived held a party, somebody had an old firework that they had kept until the end of the war, it was lit, veered off course and burned my mother.  Which is why we rarely had fireworks when we were chil

Day fifty three. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today back to the sixties and why the Spanish might face chaos   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 53 Buzz Aldrin and Marshall Tito It is day 53 of our Spanish Lockdown, phase zero hasn’t brought any real change to our situation here.  Except Chris has been able to go to the pool supply shop that is now open.  He came back with a boot load of chemicals, but the rules about car travel and distance continue and of course the beaches are closed unless you are walking along the beach.   Phase 1 on Monday might not happen if we do not make the criteria – based on number of deaths and infection rate.  But if that phase starts, we will be in a similar situation as the UK is now.   Spain can only dream of doing what Britain plans this Monday.  The Spanish press has been full of the news that Britain as a country has had more deaths now than Spain or Italy.   After having quite a simpl

Day fifty two. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today back to the sixties and why the Spanish might face chaos   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 52 corkscrews and ants   It is day 52 of our Spanish Lockdown and a Wednesday worry, the hateful weekly shop is with us once again.  This morning our neighbour was stopped by the police on the way back from the chemist. “Where are you going?” – back to my casa “Where have you come from?” – the chemists “OK perfecto, you may go.”   An encounter with the police in Spain is very different from one in the UK, where usually, if you are doing nothing wrong the police are usually quite charming.   I remember once when Chris was stopped for speeding with a blues and two behind us, pulling into the hard shoulder the W.P.C. got out and the first thing she said to Chris was “That’s a nice car, I have the new Mini too, and it really can go fast, sometimes too fast.” – And that was her very Bri

Day fifty one. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat. Today back to the sixties and why the Spanish might face chaos   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 51 Cops and Kaftans   It is day 51 of our Spanish Lockdown, and the day started early, Chris had a BBC interview to do on Skype, so I set the laptop up for him and got out the figures and facts just in case they asked him about specific numbers.   Today it was Sonia on BBC Essex, I like her and Ben her normal co-host. Having worked for the BBC it is refreshing to hear real local sounding voices, the radio station is run by our friend Lou and she tries very hard to make the content sound good.  It is really hard to do that as the BBC tries equally hard to be well meaning but often shoots itself in the foot.   Day 51 and my cousin, Pandy has discovered Facebook and also the irritating habit of mass messaging people.  It is her birthday and she is sharing the day with us, complete wit

Fifty days of Lockdown. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com A random handful of clips from the last fifty days of lockdown.

Day forty nine, Gin and Toksvig, Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 49 Gin and Toksvig It is day 49 of our Spanish Lockdown, the start of phase zero and limited outings for exercise both for children and adults.  The day is going to be hot so an early start to build some shelves for a cupboard and to finish plastering over the cables I had put in for the wifi.  All done by 10am before the sun starts to make things uncomfortable.   10 am is usually second breakfast time for the Spanish, so we had a coffee and a biscuit.   The sudden hot weather has brought with it many, many flies, they get it in the moment you open a door or a window. You can spend a great deal of time chasing them around the place.  We have mosquiteros or what the Americans call ‘screens’ and this time of year they are a godsend, that and have persianas or shutters that you can lower to darken a room and finally Toldos – awn

Day forty eight, On yer bike! Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 48 On yer bike! It is day 48 of our Spanish Lockdown, slowly we are unpicking that lock, last week, the children could go out for a bit of exercise, today we can join them. I went for a walk, I planned to take a gentle ramble into the countryside, maybe accompanied by my trust tape recorder, giving you a walk with nature, maybe accompanied by three good legs cat, who I take, or rather he takes me on his lead.  He is a bit of a cat dog, in respect that he will tolerate a lead and loves to sniff and explore every nook and cranny along the way.   Instead we headed for Petri and Justin’s big house on the corner.  Petri called from the UK.. “Justin is worried about the tall palm, can you take a look.”    So we both took a walk to the house, took some pictures of the palm, it is growing the fruit tendrils, which Justin would like cut

Day forty seven, Bank Robbers and other Bees. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 47 Bank robbers and other bees It is day 47 of our Spanish Lockdown and the wind has dropped, the sun has come out and the world looks a better place. And you find me outside. Tomorrow we are allowed out to exercise, of course there is an awful lot of complex times and where and when you can go, how old you are as to when you go and there many tables to pour over to make sure you don’t end up with a fine from the Guardia. Municipalities under thousand can go out when they want.  Poor old La Herradura, a small holiday resort that was under 5 thousand on the electoral role has found it number increase this year thanks to the thing that must never be named, so they now have 5,134 residents, in theory – living there. So they have to abide by the times set out by the government. Our niece Facetimed this afternoon, she

Day forty six, Blue Peter and Alcoholics. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 46 Blue Peter and Alcoholics   It is day 46 of our Spanish lockdown, Chris is busy watching a webinar for managing your gym back into business, it is going to be a long complex journey to open gyms up again.  They are a major place where contagion could occur.    Until there is a vaccine the new normal is going to be anything but normal.  This morning I recorded more of my children’s scripts, that kind of takes your mind of things as there is a lot of concentration pronouncing words correctly, enjoying what you are saying without going to Blue Petery.   Blue Peter is a children’s television show famous for sounding very enthusiastic about everything.  I mentioned once before when I accidently burned a dinner guest with my Advent Candle from an old coat hanger.   I worked for a couple years with Blue Peter Lesley Judd

Day forty five, Flies and Poolside Cocktails. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 45 flies and poolside cocktails Day 45 of our Spanish Lockdown.  When will it ever end?  Uncle Pedro, the Spanish Prime Minister has issued a very complicated phasing of return to halfway normal life. No dates, as it will be based on how many deaths have occurred as each day goes by. It is progress but it does look like international air travel will not return this summer.  The best that can be hoped for is that you can travel within your local region.   This is also the miserable day that Chris has to go shopping, he has to go to two supermarkets as neither are now stocked well. It is turning into an arduous task to find enough food and cleaning materials.   I guess that more than a month of Spanish manufacturing stopped has had an impact on supplies.  Today no bread, but we have potatoes, pasta and rice for car

Day forty four, Tea and Pee. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 44 Tea and Pee   It is Day 44 of our Spanish Lockdown and we have cautiously put the cushions out on the garden furniture.. I know it is a bit rash, but looking at the weather, which of course was cloudy again today, it says there should be no more rain for a whole week.    The weather in Spain varies a great deal, it is a large country and the places with mountains and northern coastline can experience some pretty horrible weather.  We used to religiously watch the weather at ten o’clock on La Una, it came just after the sports news.   Monica Lopez is our favourite presenter, she always dressed as though she was off to a very good night out, sometimes she wore a cocktail frock, some nights a glitzy number for the town and there was one night when she was all in leather.. not sure where she was heading that evening?  Of course ne

Day forty three, Parker and Lady Penelope. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 43   It is day 43 of our Spanish Lockdown and I was woken today by the noise of the traffic below us going to work.  Which I guess is a good sign.  So far only construction and manufacturing companies have been allowed back to work.   The kids can go out to exercise and yesterday we witnessed scenes similar to the British parks, with families chatting away and kids playing with each other.  It seems it is quite hard to explain social distancing to a three-year-old.   We should be allowed out from Saturday the 2nd of May for short exercise walks etc.  It will be interesting to see how that goes.  The local main town has already frozen rent on the pavement café’s all around Motril, the Mayor, Louisa, is planning to allow restaurants to open for pre-booked take-aways. This will stop crowding and hopefully give some muc

Day forty two, Killer Prawns and Jeremy Clarkson. Life behind the police lines in Lockdown Spain for a British couple and their three good legs cat.   Find out more at: https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 42 Killer Prawns and Jeremy Clarkson   It is day 42 of our Spanish Lockdown and Jen and Jack have sent us a picture from their balcony showing a little girl excitedly whizzing down the road on her tiny scooter.   For the children of Spain, today is a red-letter day.  They are now allowed out once a day for a short exercise period.  For many who live in the small flats that are dotted along this coastline, it must truly feel like freedom.   The news gets better, cautiously the curve seems to be flattening, so much so that Prime Minister Pedro Sanchez will allow us all out for a short exercise period from Saturday May 2nd    Last night we watched Jeremy Clarkson with a YouTube live edition of Drive Tribe, the previous night I had a strange unrelated dream about Jeremy Clarkson, he was demanding all sorts of thi

Today Shampoo and Donkeys Day Forty one of the Spanish Lockdown, the sometimes amusing, diary of a Brit in southern Spain under the 'Alarma' - normal life has stopped.   To find out more:  https://www.thesecretspain.com The Miba Hotel and Restaurant mentioned: https://hotelmiba.com/ Day 41 Shampoo and Donkeys It is day 41 of our Spanish Lockdown and I should not have mentioned Noah as today it has poured with rain all day, everywhere is damp and miserable. The Mediterranean does not do wet days very well.  In a country like the UK when we are used to miserable wet weather, even in the height of summer, there is always some kind of inside activity to do, here it is all about the beach or walking, cycling, climbing, getting outdoors. True if you are in a big city like Granada or Malaga you can or rather could go to a museum but that is about your lot. There are some very odd perceptions of Spain, I remember a few years ago my mother came to visit with my stepfather and my sister Ann accompanied them on the visi

Today Monkees and Post Day Forty of the Spanish Lockdown, the sometimes amusing, diary of a Brit in southern Spain under the 'Alarma' - normal life has stopped.   To find out more:  https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 40 Monkees and Post   It is day 40 of our Spanish Lockdown and if I was Noah in the Bible the floods would have gone, and I would be getting off my Ark by now.   Today thin beardy boy, from the local courier delivered our spare microphone, as the other two have succumbed to the heat and humidity. At first, he gave me a large box full of wine, but that was for the house down the road, then he gave me the plastic package the microphone had arrived in.   I undid the plastic, threw it away and washed my hands.  The box the microphone was damaged at the side, if only the company I bought it from had packed it a bit better.  You suddenly get that sinking feeling that things are going to get complicated.  But plugging the thing in, it seems to work ok.    I have a love hate relationship with microphones

Today Boobies and Zoom Day Thirty nine of the Spanish Lockdown, the sometimes amusing, diary of a Brit in southern Spain under the 'Alarma' - normal life has stopped.   To find out more:  https://www.thesecretspain.com Day 39 Boobies and Zoom It is day 39 of our Spanish Lockdown, last night brought more custard and more bad dreams.  I seem to keep getting those high anxiety dreams where I am not in control.   I have not really had them since I worked at the radio station.  And it was about the radio station last night, I had to engineer a radio show, but I managed to take the radio station off air as I did not recognise the buttons that sent the studio to the transmitters.   I imagine that we are all having similar dreams of not being in control, because I think this must be a bit like being in Prison, having decisions taken away from you about where you can go and what you can do.   The Spanish Government have back tracked on the decision only to allow children to accompany adults to supermarkets, pharmacies