The Tom Barnard Show

Dogs are man's best friend.  But are they baby's best friend?  That depends largely on the dog.  Some dogs are protective, some dogs are nurturing, some dogs are apprehensive.  You'll want to clamp down on that last one.  Carol will give you some tips on how to do so, at least in between stories about Jude acting weird.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

People often marvel at the resilience of the human body.  Those people have never experienced altitude sickness.  The act of standing on top of a hill can practically kill you.  It's not all bad though.  You can be the ghost that haunts Altitude Sickness Hill.  People would come from across the globe to see you.  Or measure your presence with an EMF meter.  Close enough.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Dancing is just harmless fun, right?  Wrong.  Dancing will put you in a nursing home at the age of 30.  Okay, maybe that's a bit of an exaggeration.  Still, it's not normal to need a hip replacement in your 20s, which is what you get when you regularly stretch your legs at a 180 degree angle.  Unless you're a genetic freak like Jean-Claude Van Damme, that kind of thing should seem like a pretty obviously bad idea when you first try it.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

The world is ending.  We're all going to die.  To be more specific, right wing people are potentially going to be allowed to say whatever they want on Twitter.  But that's basically the same thing, at least if you ask the average Twitter user.  We'll all remember where we were when people started disagreeing with us on the internet.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Nobody's watching the USFL.  Oh, let me explain.  The USFL is a new football league trying to compete with the NFL.  And just like the way you didn't know it existed, neither does anyone else.  Or they do and just don't care.  The real question is, why would they?  It's the NFL except the talent isn't as good.  And with the XFL allegedly on the horizon, they won't be able to get the extreme football market on lockdown either.  Only time will tell if they can carve out a niche.  With every comedian dying lately, maybe they can become the world's first comedy football league.  Think about it.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Usually, when a moth enters your home it's annoying.  They're not dangerous or unsanitary, they're just annoying.  Not this time.  This moth tells stories.  It's also an organization, not a literal moth.  The opposable thumbs and human brain really help when writing a book.  They also help when telling stories in an interesting way, which is what this book is all about.  We all know someone who really likes telling people what happened to them but is absolutely awful at it.  It is a moral imperative to help these people to stop saying "like, um" every other word when talking.  Perhaps this book could remedy that. How to Tell a Story: The Essential Guide to Memorable Storytelling from The Moth - amzn.to/3v9GkiWSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Meet Ryan O'Neill. Not the actor. The piano God. And one of my favorite realtors who is damn good at what he does. Can you make money and get noticed on social media? Share Like enjoy Moon Pjugg and Hobbs. And send your audio audition to replace pjugg at moonpjugghobbs@gmail.comSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

KQ Icon Mike Gelfand joins us in studio and we discuss all things Elon Musk. Boy genius or madman? Why is he really trying to buy Twitter? How soon before Tesla becomes the largest volume luxury brand in the US.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

There's just something about opening that Sunday paper and seeing your favorite comic. Nostalgia is a powerful force according to Jeremy Dauber and another powerful force is Reverend Tim Christopher! Oh look, that 2 things that you can do on a Sunday See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Rick isn't here to talk about pinball.  That's why we wait until he's off the phone to dedicate an entire segment to it.  While he's on, we talk about The Johnny Rodriguez Project and classic country.  Not the "my truck broke down and I'm out of whiskey" kind of country.  The real classic stuff.  The stuff I've never actually heard.  But Tom, Gelfand, and Doug sure have.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Since the 60s, Disney World has operated almost like an autonomous region.  They collect their own taxes, pave their own roads, and permit their own buildings.  That may be coming to an end soon.  What impact this will have on the Magic Kingdom isn't known, but there's always one thing for sure: ticket prices will go up.  It's like the rising of the sun every morning.  The world could end and Disney World would still, somehow, get more expensive.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Advocating for minimalism may seem redundant when we're on the tail end of everyone being trapped in their homes for two years.  But minimalism can mean a lot of things.  Social media addiction is a problem, for example.  Using it only when it's actually helpful?  That's minimalism.  Scrolling for six hours a day is pretty much the definition of excess.  Minimalize it.  Same for watching the news all day.  If it's excessive, get rid of it, even if it's excessive in an intangible way.  Don't, however, get rid of your books.  They make you look smart, and plus you can learn from them. Things That Matter: Overcoming Distractions to Pursue a More Meaningful Life - amzn.to/3xFBQm3See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

What was it, one week ago that we said movies are good again?  Scratch that.  They suck.  The age of movies has ended forever.  Just watch things from your childhood.  Those are always good, and not just because they're what you grew up with.  Well, maybe just because of that.  Sometimes you have to look in the mirror and ask yourself: was Surf Ninjas actually a good movie?See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Jon Stewart has a new show.  What, you didn't hear?  You and everyone else, apparently, because nobody's watching.  He's telling himself that nobody knows why, but we all know why.  It's the same reason cable news and talk shows are dying.  That's right: it's because Tim is just so fascinating that nobody's watching anything else.  Also because you can go hug mascots at Disney World again.  It's been too long.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

You could say that spending several years sailing around the untamed wilds is an unusual thing to do.  Not for Stephen.  He's done it twice now, and he wrote a book about it both times.  It's certainly not a journey for everyone.  Undrinkable water, muggings, storms, sleeping in a boat.  People become apoplectic when their coffee maker breaks.  For those people, it's best to read about exploration rather than attempt it. The Five-Year Voyage: Exploring Latin American Coasts and Rivers - amzn.to/3xobiW0See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Have you broken a bone?  If you're half of Americans, you have.  That's a lot of broken bones.  How about this one: have you ever superglued your hand to a basketball court in protest?  It's much rarer than the first thing.  We know of only one instance, but I'm sure it has to have happened at least twice.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

She threatened. Its real. You can try out to replace her by sending an audio file audition to moonpjugghobbs@gmail.comToday its Moon and Hobbs. Talking bootcalls, dead rock stars, dead comedians, and 2 minutes talking about balls without even 1 dick joke! Share Like ya know....See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today, we rememeber our long time pal Gilbert Gottfried with some of the most memorable moments we have ever had on the podcast since we started back in 2012. His laugh will live in our memories till the end of time. I hope you enjoy this best of cause I know that Gilbert enjoyed laughing along with Tom and the crew #RIPGilbertGottfriedSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

A Hodge podge episode where we talk about physical diseases, Macular degeneration, self-driving cars, Emo Phillips in a Northern Wisconsin casino. In honor of the passing of Gilbert Gottfried, we play some old live KQ Walser sports that nearly ended Doug's radio career.  On the automotive front, we talk about GM and Honda partnering in a sub 30K all electric vehicle, the introduction of the Ford F-150 Lightning and the worlds first trans-gender Traffic report. Never a dull moment.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Today, we speak at length on two topics: soda, and the health issues of the Russian-Jewish diaspora.  And no, they're not related.  At least, nobody's proven that they're related yet.  Gelfand's theory involves inbreeding, which unfortunately you cannot diet and exercise your way out of.  You can, however, diet and exercise your way out of obesity, which is a much more widespread issue than having an improperly-shaped family tree.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoicesSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.