Everyone Is Right

The universe — it’s big. No, that’s an understatement. It’s very big. It can be a bit much, really. There’s just a whole lot of it, and it’s got a whole lot of stuff in it. Way more nothing than stuff, truth be told, but still. It’s more stuff than you can shake a stick at. It’s a pretty weird place too. Like how we can only see 5% of it. What’s up with the other 95%? Nobody knows. That’s weird. And even the stuff we can see is weird. It grows, it shines, it twists and dances and undulates and sometimes makes other weird stuff like love and helicopters and neckties. And that’s just the stuff that we know about. Who knows how weird the other stuff is? Fortunately, not too long ago, a bunch of weird talking monkeys started poking around in an otherwise unremarkable corner of the universe, and over the years those monkeys have come up with all sorts of weird explanations in order to to make sense of the whole ordeal. We are here today with one of those talking monkeys, a particularly hairless hominid named K