Enlightened By Dogs With Kathy Kawalec

We are replaying this deep and insightful episode of Enlightened By Dogs, where Kathy shares a story that many struggling dog moms will relate to. Hear how she overcame difficult challenges and learn how her hardest dog taught her the true meaning of living a joy-filled partnership lifestyle with dogs.   Some of our most important life lessons come from our hardest dogs. If it wasn’t for those challenges, Kathy tells us that she  would never have the experience, insight, and determination to become the better person she is today.   Phoenix taught her partnership lessons like how to be a loving leader for our dogs, how our emotional responses inform our dogs and how to communicate with our dogs the right way.    Then there was the crucial life skill of the importance of taking responsibility for our own thoughts, emotions and actions.    And, most of all, the importance of being patient.   Tune in to this candid episode that might just fill your eyes with tears…and your heart with hope.   LOVE TO LEARN MORE? 

Today, we are replaying a compilation of inspiring tales from dog moms who faced various challenges with their reactive dogs and then completely turned things around.   From dogs barking incessantly at fences, reacting aggressively on leashes, fearing strangers, or simply refusing to move on sidewalks due to panic, these stories shine a light on hope. No matter the existing relationship with your dog - even if it's already good - there’s so much more!,   These dog moms embraced the partnership principles, and with a change in mindset that led to a trust-based approach, they transformed their relationships and their life with their dogs.    Key Takeaways:   Importance of Partnership: Many dog moms who faced challenges with their dogs achieved transformation by adopting the 'partnership approach’. This approach focuses on mutual understanding, trust, and cooperation rather than traditional training methods.   Mental Shift Over Training: A recurring theme is the transition from trying to "fix" the dogs thr

Kathy Kawalec shares an intimate story about her border collie Maya, who had been rejected by three homes by the time she was six months old. Maya was labeled "untrainable" due to her uncontrollable and dangerous chasing habits. Experienced trainers struggled with her, but Kathy approached the situation differently. Instead of focusing on training specific behaviors, Kathy prioritized establishing a strong foundation with Maya, emphasizing these key partnership principles: Role modeling: Showing Maya the norms of living as a family and helping her adapt through classical conditioning. Meeting Maya's needs: Ensuring she felt heard, had a sense of belonging, and felt she was contributing to the family. Building trust: Not setting timelines for Maya's progress, but taking things day by day. Decision-making: Using the clarity framework to guide choices, based on trust and desired outcomes. The Partnership Dance Steps: Incorporating dance steps into their daily activities to foster connection and communi

Kathy is replaying this important episode featuring the journey she took with her sheltie from fearful to confident.  In this heartwarming and enlightening episode, Kathy reminisces about her journey with her Sable Sheltie, Haley, from the early 1990s. Beginning with a look at Haley's profound fear of strangers, the narrative evolves to reflect on the transformational nature of their bond.    Despite the obstacles they faced, like Haley's unexpected chase after horses, Kathy employed her deep respect for animals, intuitive training methods, and a departure from conventional wisdom.    Over the years, Kathy's philosophy has come full circle. While obedience, even when taught through positive reinforcement, was long seen as the gold standard, Kathy believes it's not the most compassionate way to connect with our dogs. She emphasizes that positive reinforcement training isn’t the end; it’s just the beginning. Introducing her progressive concept: partnership-centered cooperation. This method prioritizes living ha

Ever caught your dog looking into your eyes and felt they were trying to tell you something, but couldn't quite grasp their message? You try to listen, but deep down you continue to wonder what your dog is really trying to say.   Whether it's a simple need or a crucial warning, our four-legged friends communicate using body language, vocalizations, and various behaviors. While they can't 'speak human,' we often don't 'speak dog’ – creating misunderstandings that can lead to frustrations, meltdowns, over-arousal and other escalations that happen when there is a communication gap.    In this episode, we dive into understanding these subtle "dog whispers" that are often overlooked. We'll uncover the importance of recognizing and honoring these signs to nurture a relationship based on trust and connection. From decoding 'bad behaviors' to recognizing early signs of discomfort, we'll discuss ways to strengthen your bond with your furry friend.    Join us as we help you step into your dog's paws and see the world t

do we jump to conclusions, thinking that our dogs are refusing to listen or choosing to be difficult? This week’s podcast episode invites us to see our dogs in a new light - as beings HAVING a hard time, NOT giving us a hard time. It’s all about creating “a life of compassion, connection, and cooperation with our dogs. And everyone else in our life too!”   Tune in and explore how we can be more forgiving and understanding, not just towards our dogs but also towards ourselves. 3 Key Takeaways:   Shift in Perspective: Viewing our dogs not as beings giving us a hard time but as beings having a hard time can revolutionize our approach to dog parenting, fostering a compassionate and understanding relationship. Pause-Breathe-Connect Approach: Before reacting to undesired behaviors, pausing to breathe and connect puts us in a better emotional place, enabling a calm and considered response to our dogs’ actions. Trust and Respect: Building a relationship based on trust and respect rather than control and obed

In this episode, Kathy explores the profound connection between our thoughts, feelings, and actions and the way they shape our lives with our dogs. We’re delving into how powerful our minds really are and how we can better utilize our brains to help us.   Our old ‘Lizzie’ brain often throws us off course, highlighting the hurdles and tough bits, convincing us to stick to the status quo, even when our hearts are yearning for change. Kathy encourages us to tap into our executive thinking brain to break through this resistance and to set our imaginative brains to work to discover ways to experience safe, calm, joyful, and enriching lives with our dogs.   In this heartfelt conversation, Kathy assists dog moms in recognizing the significant effects of synchronizing their thoughts and actions to nurture a more cooperative and trust-filled bond with their dogs. 3 key takeaways:   You have the power to assign a particular executive task to your executive brain, and then follow through on the ideas that come out o

In today’s heartwarming episode, we dive into the essence of consent and freedom in our relationship with our dogs. Reflecting on a coaching session from the Brilliant Partners Academy, we discuss how reimagining our approach towards dogs can build a deep-rooted trust and a cooperative partnership.    Many of our dogs face anxiety at the vet and with difficult caregiving procedures, and this episode provides insights on handling those situations. The conversation revolves around allowing our dogs to have the agency of choice, creating an environment where they feel seen and heard. We unravel what it means to put on our ‘professional hat’, emphasizing a drama-free approach, ensuring our dogs know we have their backs.    Peppered with personal anecdotes about Kathy’s dog, Sue, and the importance of reading our dog’s small gestures, this episode will resonate deeply with every dog mom. It’s about listening, understanding, and evolving our bond with our dogs.   3 key takeaways:   Granting dogs the freedom of ch

In this episode of the "Enlightened by Dogs" podcast, Kathy sheds light on what might be keeping us from having that trusting, heart-to-heart connection with our dogs. Often, without realizing it, we may be building walls between ourselves and our dogs, in spite of our true intentions.   Being stuck in our heads, worrying, or fearing mistakes can hinder the genuine connection that we crave. Kathy emphasizes the importance of being present, avoiding the busy-ness trap, and understanding our unintentional addiction to drama. Inspired by insights from her Brilliant Partners Academy, Kathy shares stories of dog moms who discovered the magic that unfolds when they shift their focus from overthinking to being present and open hearted.    Listen in as Kathy urges us to re-evaluate our habits, breathe through challenges, and embrace the true essence of partnership with our dogs.   Key Takeaways:   Building a heart-to-heart connection with our dogs often begins by fostering a similar connection with ourselves. Our

Experiencing the true depth of connection with our dogs lies in understanding our own feelings and mindset.   This episode revolves around a pivotal thought: What if we could manifest the emotions we wish to experience in the future, right in this moment? And what would that mean for our future relationship and partnership life with our dogs?   It’s not about waiting for our dogs to behave a certain way to feel happiness or contentment, it’s about cultivating those feelings in the moment, today.   Often, we find ourselves in a cycle of waiting: "I'll be happy when my dog listens better." But could it be that by feeling happy and calm now, we pave the way for a lifelong harmonious relationship?   One of the most impactful takeaways from this conversation is the recognition of our power to choose our reactions. There exists a brief, transformative moment between an event and our response to it. By harnessing this moment, choosing understanding and compassion, we can fundamentally transform our relationship with

At the heart of every reactive behavior our dogs display is a stress spiral – a chain of emotions and misunderstandings. As dog moms, we often face challenges, especially when confronted with the seeming unpredictability of our dogs' reactions. But what if the key to resolving these reactions isn't in training your dog, but in retraining your brain?   We explore the powerful concept that taking responsibility for our own thoughts, especially during difficult experiences, can drastically change the dynamic with our dogs. The reactivity spiral isn't just about your dog's actions; it's a two-way street, influenced as much by your dog's behavior as by your own reactions. When we become more aware of our responses, we can start to influence the outcome, breaking free from the cycle that damages trust and confidence.   This shift in perspective and approach not only nurtures a deeper bond but also helps in fostering an environment where our dogs can thrive, free from reactivity and full of confidence.   Tune in to

In today's episode, we look at the world of natural communication and connection with our canine companions. Think back to when you first brought your pup home, that initial bond, the trust, and the love that started to flourish. However, as life happens, unpredictable and potentially traumatic events can strain that bond. So, how do we foster a relationship that ensures our dogs look to us as trustworthy during these scary experiences?    Reflecting on the nature of dogs, puppies naturally gravitate towards their mother and littermates. It's instinctual. They seek warmth, protection, and food. As dog moms, we can and should continue to nurture this instinct, ensuring our dogs always feel that safety with us.    Instead of focusing on traditional trained commands that might inadvertently teach our dogs to NOT seek us out, it's about embracing a different approach. Let's teach through understanding, patience, role modeling and true connection, much like how we'd guide a toddler.    But what if a traumatic even

In this first episode of a three-part series, Kathy highlights the importance of building your dog’s social confidence. She uses a variety of scenarios to explain what it means and when it’s necessary to be an advocate for your dog.   The series takes a closer look at ways you can stay connected with your dog in awkward and somewhat unpleasant social situations.   Did you know that your puppy or young dog is at the most impressionable stage of their life?   They’re experiencing most things for the first time, which is thrilling! But it’s equally scary because unpleasant experiences can have a long-lasting impact on how they experience ordinary life events moving forward. So, we need to be intentionally mindful of our puppies and young dogs, until they’re confident and resilient enough to stand on their own paws.   In this episode:   How to be an advocate for your dog in the face of social behavior and training pressure How to address well-meaning yet unwanted opinions about how you should handle and train

We often make unconscious decisions about what our dog’s unwanted behavior means, and then jump to conclusions and take actions based on those assumptions. But what if their behavior doesn’t mean what we think it means?   In today’s episode, we’re going to take a look at why dogs behave certain ways, and how we commonly respond to those behaviors, without even thinking much about it.   When you have greater clarity and a deeper understanding of what your dog does, why they do it, and how they respond to you, it helps plant seeds of trust – and all it takes is a perspective shift.   Kathy guides you through the common behaviors (and misunderstandings) through the lens of the Five Dog Personality Types, along with suggestions for reframes and a fresh perspective that will build more trust and cooperation between you and your dog!   In this episode:   What negative thoughts are common for each personality type How understanding your dog’s personality can help you reframe your thoughts New thinking that lea

When we take a deeper look at what it means to walk in partnership with our dogs, we find opportunities for bonding, connection, mutual respect and kindness.   Most of us dog moms envision walking our dogs as an enjoyable experience … but that’s not always how it goes!    For many dog moms, walking their dogs can be a stressful and frustrating experience, rather than a beautiful bonding opportunity. But, what if walking with your dog was easy? It sounds like a dream come true, right? Join Kathy in this enlightening discussion about what it means to be a dog mom who has the mindset of walking in partnership … something that we do WITH our dogs … not something we do for our dogs, or to our dogs.   In this episode:   Why you should ‘think like a mother’ when walking with your dog How to make walking with your dog easy Dogs provide a safe space to learn how to nurture a relationship of respect and kindness Quotes:   “Guided by deep love for our dogs, we can learn how to better navigate the world as ad

In this episode of Enlightened By Dogs, Kathy dives into using the power of your thinking to reach the full potential of becoming a brilliant partner with your dog.    Sharing some of her favorite strategies, Kathy makes a case for taking responsibility for our thoughts, feelings, and actions as key for having a successful and happy relationship with our canine partners.    Visualizing the life we want to have and having a balance between achieving and growing can help us better understand and connect with our dogs for lifelong partnership success, and for immediate happy feelings that we can share with our dogs.    Get ready to change your life and become a brilliant partner for your dogs!   In this episode:   3 Strategies To Help You Become a Brilliant Partner for Your Dog Using Our Imaginations and Brains to Create the Life We Want Become the person who can, before you become the person who does. Success isn’t only about what you accomplish externally, but also who you become internally.   Quotes

All behavior is communication, so how your dog responds to you (or doesn’t respond to you) is how they are trying to tell you how they feel in the moment.  When your dog seemingly refuses to listen to you, it can be really frustrating. Sometimes, it can even feel like your dog isn’t listening to you on purpose, which makes you even more frustrated.  Thankfully, Kathy knows just what you need to do to change your story from ‘my dog won’t listen’ to ‘my dog loves to listen’! Now, the answer might not be what you expected! To get your dog to listen to you, first, you’ve got to listen to your dog.  Tune in for all the details in this insightful episode!   In this episode: The real reason why your dog won’t listen to you How to reframe your thoughts about your dog’s listening Why role modeling can help you guide behavior How to create a plan for when you feel that your dog isn’t listening to you Quotes:   “When you believe that your dog is not listening, I would invite you to reframe that into: my dog ha

In this episode Kathy will help you identify the root cause of your dog’s excessive barking, and guide you through the eight steps of her Bark Busting Protocol to prevent and rehab unwanted barking, the partnership way.   Pretty much every dog mom has a story of their dog’s over-the-top barking. Kathy certainly has a few stories of her own, and she shares the exact steps she took with unwanted barking with her own dogs in this episode.   So, what are the steps to getting on top of unwanted barking? What’s the real cause of it? And is it possible to stop it after the habit has already formed?   In this episode:   A reminder that barking is normal and natural – but that doesn’t mean it is never problematic Why the first step in overcoming unwanted barking is a shift in our own perspective How to manage unwanted barking and understanding why dogs do it The four main categories of unwanted, over-the-top barking, and Kathy’s 8-Step Protocol   Quotes:   “If we yell at our dogs because they’re barking, the

We’re making it real with this episode!  It’s when we step into our place as trustworthy role models and loving leaders that our relationship with our dog truly blossoms.   When we and our dogs are feeling safe, calm and happy – Kathy calls that ‘being in the green zone’ – then we are able to connect, make better choices and interrupt the behavior spiral of stress that no one wants.   As Kathy emphasizes in this episode of Enlightened By Dogs, we need to move away from the desensitizing, counter-conditioning mindset of dog training that is so embedded in our culture and focus on the human-dog connection that leads to natural cooperation.   In this episode: Co-regulation is the key to strong relationships and helps to achieve a state of safety and connection. Reacting mindlessly to emotions can lead to being stuck in survival mode, so it is important to stay in the green zone. The Autonomic Nervous System plays an important role in creating trust. Quotes:   “What greater joy is there than walking wi

Are you getting in the way of building the future of your dreams with your dog?   When we welcome a dog into our lives, we usually dream of living in perfect harmony together with (preferably) no ‘unwanted behavior’. So, when things don’t turn out the way we thought they would, it’s easy to let ourselves get lost in a sea of negative thoughts.   We become so focused on everything that’s ‘wrong’ with our lives (and our dogs), that we forget to focus on what’s truly important.   While life can seem like an unpredictable journey with its share of successes and failures, it is key to pay attention when it comes to our emotions, actions, and ultimately, our experiences.    Kathy’s advice? Adopt a "choose your own adventure" mindset to create the life you want with your dog and trust the process. Remain resilient and maintain an optimistic outlook in order to face life’s ups and downs. Practicing good listening without judgment and staying present are great tools for creating a healthy relationship with our dog or