Patio Lanterns

- into skateboarding - good grades in all my classes - helps mom and dad at the farm when needed RAINDROP GOES UP AGAINST MIKE GAMBLIN IN THIS ABSOLUTE BLOODBATH OF A RAP BATTLE. Young girl gets tossed up in the air by a bison while on a visit to a national park...but she landed it! Goggles...in or out? And is Coffey Anderson trading his cowboy hat for a tinfoil hat? We discuss. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

NEWSFLASH PEOPLE: Cats are fatter than ever. Stop feeding them so many vegetables. In this episode, Randy and Kurt sit down and really delve into some significant topics such as: mysterious local vandalism, government conspiracies, unhealthy diets for animals, and work faux pas. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019 Thanks to Castanet and Oneindia News for the audio clips!

The Poetry Podcast Our #kawhi watch has ended (insert Jon Snow). Scents by Youell™ is revealed to the world. Kurt performs a dramatic reading...Randy is perplexed. Would you rathers, power moves, song of the summer noms...this episode has got it all people! Except Stranger Things, we do NOT talk about that. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

We are clapping!!! Ryan passes out in a park somewhere before celebrating Canada Day. Kurt leaves the country for 5 whole days and only has 1 urinal rant to show for it. We have been paying very, very close attention to NBA free agency #kawhiwatch. And something about Mats Zuccarello (hockey player for our non sports fans fans) being a lizard. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

THE BEST SOUNDING EPISODE YET Randy finally learns how to use his podcast microphone. Kurt is really getting into broadway/musical soundtracks. DST update!!! What's the deal with farmer's markets? And how can a bee (single) spice up your sex life? Nothing else really happens, but this episode sounds fantastic. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

We're knee deep in the lake of PODCASTING. UPDATE ON THE LOST EPISODE. Ryan is not getting enough ice cream. Kurt slips and falls and you won't believe what happens next! Seattle - the Wifi-less city. Ryan gives surfing a go, with hilarious results (LOL). Is Drake a bigger factor in the Raptors' success than we think?? Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

SPORTS TALK IS BACK The St. Louis Blues win the Stanley Cup. Nice job team! What's your favorite instagram filter? Kurt receives a standing ovation!! Ryan gets lost in the upside down! And we've got a new power move for you to try on your next date. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

WE THE BEST PODCAST A music heavy episode of the pod.....Kurt sings Katy Perry's new hit single and introduces 4 nominees for #SONGOFTHESUMMER. Ryan suggests a new power (weirdo) move to try on tinder dates. Later, we try finding each on Chatroulette. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

Come on in, the water's fine! The boys have RAPTOR'S FEVER!! Jk, Randy thinks Lebron is playing and Kurt is just there for the liquor. Kurt experiences violent explosions from his toilet and nearly destroys his house. Our dear Patio Lanternites got way to many problems on their hands so we brought in advice-expert Ms. Shanna Graham on the show to help (min 30).

The Roy is a great place to relax and meet with friends. Great food and friendly waitresses await you, with daily food specials and a warm atmosphere. PATIO LANTERNS - THE BASKETBALL AND GARDENING PODCAST Ryan encounters some weird sneezers. Kurt encounters an ant. Game of Thrones is over but our rants are just beginning. Congrats to "Give me Hedman" for winning the 2019 Patio Lanterns NHL Bracket Challenge! Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

IT'S THE PODCASTING PLAYOFFS - "It's the time you really gotta prove yourself, cause everyone's going out for summer." After a disturbing hiatus, we're back! Kurt is sick and Randy is in a foreign land. Why aren't dress shorts more common? How are our NHL brackets doing? (Hint: badly). The Big Dog Daddy throws out a heater just in time for summer while Taylor Swift disappoints (ME lol) big time. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

MOON BOOTS ARE HERE AND THE FUTURE STINKS ICBC is modifying our genomes? We HATE Game of Thrones HATERS. Kurt envisions Randy on the cover of "Dad" magazine. Donation bins - why are they dangerous and can they be stopped? Everyone's NHL brackets are busted - get the inside scoop on this edition of #sportstalk. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

The official podcast of the NHL Welcome to the Patio Lanterns NHL bracket challenge! We have created a fantasy league for big $$$. Listen to our tips, tricks, and quips in our sports segment! Randy has a new "power" move. Kurt got a part of his body waxed. 1. Create a bracket here: https://cliambrown.com/bracket2019/ 2. Copy your secret edit link, and then paste it here: https://cliambrown.com/bracket2019/league/join/xqd3qctr You can check out the league members & results here: https://cliambrown.com/bracket2019/league/xpjz6 PS: Send $20 to our email: patiolanternspodcast@gmail.com to officially enter into the grand prize sweepstakes! Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

LEGALLY BLIND NAKED MAN GUNNED DOWN SPRINTING ACROSS FORMULA ONE CIRCUIT Randy and Kurt have had enough of their respective big city lifestyles and are moving out to separate small towns. Randy has a new business idea and you can have it, free of charge! Michelob Ultra changed their slogan and it really irks Kurt. Kurt ventures to a house party and is met with mixed results. "Where have all the illegally blind people gone" - Sam Roberts. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019

LET'S CANOODLE Sit down, shut up and get ready for our hottest episode yet. The boys create THE perfect playlist to fulfill your every sexual desire. We also start the conversation on SONG OF THE SUMMER 2019. The spa is good and you guys should check it out. One thing not to check out...grapefruit. THEY SUCK. Go to our instagram @plpodcast and nominate your #songofthesummer2019 Check out our bedroom bangers playlist from this episode: https://open.spotify.com/user/1xr51mc3oj8wvpqcvtzlrh2qn/playlist/1d9Rc1vkE2dR4R5uemZDrl?si=bhj36DImRDi34V-i50JJ0Q

I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride I'm gon ride on you baby, on you lady all night, all night I'ma take care of your body, I'll be gentle, don't you scream It's getting hotter, make it softer, feel your chest on top of me I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride, I'm gon ride I'm gon ride on you baby, on you lady all night, all night I'm gon make you feel that loving, getting weak all in your knees Kiss your body from the tip top all the way down to your feet. [0 mins]: Winter SUCKS and anybody who says different is a liar! Stop with the super erotic worm moons already. Kurt finally watched all of the Rocky and Creed movies and re-ranked them to Randy's displeasure. [35 mins]: Our favorite kiwi, Ryder Hoy (HOYYYYYYY), orders the tuna, no crust. Instagram: @plpodcast

THE 7-ELEVEN OF PODCASTS - PEAKING 24HRS A DAY, 7 DAYS A WEEK [0 mins]: Daylight Savings Time came and went with minimal casualties thanks to some smart planning by RDAWG and the Caveman. Randy still doesn't like Twitter. IKEA - go for the furniture, stay for the cinnamon buns? Gynecologists for men - why isn't this a thing? Boiled pork is killing dogs, let's stop this before it's too late. [39 mins]: We are ecstatic to have our first female guest as Ryan's friend Nicole joins us on the patio. Although, Kurt is wary of this stranger and puts together a friendship quiz. What are hot guy names? How can we market to the female demographic? We ask Nicole. Instagram: @plpodcast

"If you could have one superhero what would it be?" Disgraced former co-host Geoff Kittson joins us to discuss: the origin of "Randy", Rancier Farms, tailgating at the ferry terminal, #swine09, and the challenges of Bumble. PATIO LANTERNS - THE PREMIER SPORTS TALK PODCAST PS - if you have any news on the whereabouts of past podcast interviewee, Avi, please let us know. Instagram: @plpodcast

We're gonna make you feel GRRRRRRRREAT hombre! Ever appreciated how the toilet seat doesn't sit directly on the rim?? No, didn't think so. Randy finds his long lost brother in Mexico. Kurt breaks down the top tier restaurants versus the crap ones. Is Randy the perfect test subject? Yes, yes he is. 2 cups DOES NOT EQUAL 2 cups. Instagram: @plpodcast

*Featuring for the FIRST TIME EVER - A LIVE STUDIO AUDIENCE* [0 mins]: Ryan goes on his biggest rant yet about his annoying classmates. Kurt is pissed off at Superstore (basically the anti-Costco). Vancouver is SHUT DOWN due to extreme weather! Dave Assman is a big ass and gets back at Saskatchewan Government Insurance and we love it. [27 mins]: Kent MacDonald (another friend of the podcast - you may know him as the guy who always loses at Jenga) joins us for a lengthy talk. We try and get inside his head via personality quizzes but we mostly laugh at Randy. Special thanks to Kenny Fong on YouTube for the Late Night Show Intro music. Instagram: @plpodcast