Box Office Battle

Giant creatures eat find people through vibrations in the ground and then devour them in Tremors.  Then a cop has his death faked, is forced to undergo plastic surgery, and learn impossible martial arts in order to protect America in Remo Williams:  The Adventure Begins.  We're doing a double dose of Fred Ward.

Stories of cops, criminals, kids, and others intersect in the comedic movie:  Big Trouble.  Mutants are given the choice of taking a pill and losing their powers, or fighting humans (I guess).  Also, there's a mutant who becomes a more dangerous mutant whilst being entangle in a love triangle (I guess) in X-Men The Last Stand.  Ben Foster(?) gets the Box Office treatment this episode.

A man with multiple personalities (John Lithgow) steals as many children as he can to traumatize them into have multiple personalities themselves in Raising Cain.  A man will stop at nothing to be famous, even being incarcerated well beyond his original sentence.  Tom Hardy stars in Bronson.  Which movie will win?  Hell, which personality will win?

Brandon Routh gets a double feature, and lucky for all of us neither movie is Superman Returns.  First Routh is a detective in a monster movie noir:  Dylan Dog Dead of Night.  Then Scott Pilgrim must face the League of Seven Evil Exes in Scott Pilgrim Vs. the World.

 Kung Fury answers the question:  what happens when a cop from Miami in 1985 goes back in time to kill Hitler?  He finds friendships with dinosaurs, vikings, and the Norse God of Thunder of course.  John Wick is the tale of a retired hitman who loses it when the mob kills his dog.  Today we explore two balls out action movies to decide who will make it up to Mount Valhalla.

A lot of naked women join the Nazi party and try to keep moral up anyway they can in the grindhouse feature:  She Devils of the SS.  The evil facing it involves the Antichrist taking over the world (perched in Seattle), and deciding he's going to get down with Anna Kendrick in Rapture Palooza.

Today we break from the formula to pit The Avengers against (out in theaters right now) The Avengers Age of Ultron.  You already know what these movies are, so let's just say that one is better, and we're going to get to the bottom of it.

Jean Claude Van Dam is trying to disarm many bombs from exploding, and fights a penguin mascot in Sudden Death.  Will Forte and Kristen Wiig can't seem to disarm even one bomb, and fights with a celery stalk up his @$$ in MacGruber.  The movies of Powers Booth face off tonight, and only one can survive.

Aubrey Plaza movies face off today.  First, a group of teenagers a-la The Hardy Boys try to solve a crime in Mystery Team.  Then a curious ad on Craig's List that's attempting to find a partner for time travel leads to an hilarious adventure in Safety Not Guaranteed.

Today we cover Stephen King inspired movies featuring Scatman Crothers.  Scott Baio is a high school student who gains the ability of telekinesis and uses it as any of us would:  to undress girls in public in the teen comedy Zapped!  Then Jack Nicholson moves his family into haunted hotel and decides to kill them when he gets bored in the Kubrick masterpiece The Shining.

Today:  a Kurt Russell-off!  First a trucker (Russell) and Kim Catrall fights wizards and creatures in the "classic" Big Trouble in Little China.  Then a group of scientists in Antartica (Russell, Wilford Brimley, Keith David, and others) battle a shape-shifting alien and paranoia in The Thing.  Finally Kurt Russell coaches the 1980 USA hockey team in the biopic about The Miracle on Ice--Miracle.  Aaron Donaldson guest stars as our judge.

This week we have two under-appreciated films of Kevin Smith.  Ben Affleck loses his wife, and has to raise his daughter with only the help of his father (George Carlin).  But perhaps the most difficult thing for him is to put aside his old life for the new one in Jersey Girl.  Seth Rogan and Elizabeth Banks play best friends who consummate their relationship while making a self produced internet video (you know the kind) in Zack and Miri.  

Hoyt Axtin obtains a mogwai that comes with three rules.  He gives it to his son who doesn't hesitate to break all of them.  Zack Galliger and Phoebe Cates star in Gremlins.  Then Bruce Willis crawls through air ducts and broken glass just to find true love in Die Hard.  It's two underrated holiday classics squaring off today.

Gabe Caplan plays a hard on his luck coach who takes four street ballers from New York to college in Nevada and turns the basketball world upside down in Fast Break.  Chuck is a child who decides that he won't play baseball again until nuclear weapons are disarmed.  Amazing Grace is the Boston Celtic who gives Chuck's movement traction.  Gregory Peck plays the president who must deal with these two and the Russian Premier in Amazing Grace and Chuck.  Only one film will sit atop the standings.

Two die hard Celtic fans kidnap the star player of the Utah Jazz the night before Game Seven in Celtic Pride.  Two brothers coach against each other for the right for their teams to play Pee Wee football in Little Giants.  Only one movie will score enough points.

The men of Shooting the Show take over hosting duties this week and debate albums:  The Walking Wounded vs. Just Say Yes.  A winner will be chosen.  Editing will be done.  Paper airplanes will be thrown.  Enjoy.

A mad scientist creates tomatoes that turn into people with the sound of certain songs.  This could reignite the tomato war from ten years ago.  George Clooney stars in Return of the Killer Tomatoes.  Then a lot of stupid people do stupid things the Coen Brothers film Burn After Reading.  It's a George Clooney tour de force.

An alcoholic clown (Bobcat Goldwaith) learns a valuable lesson about drinking too much on the job and not beating up mimes en route to rescuing his girlfriend (Julie Brown) from a cocaine addled children program host (Tom Kenny) in Shakes the Clown.  Then a host of a children's program (Robin Williams) vows to kill his squeaky clean replacement (Edward Norton), but might be beaten to the punch by the mob, a network executive, or many other dangers in the dark comedy Death to Smoochy.  Only one R-rated demented children show starring Robin Williams can come out victorious.

Today we pit Virginia Madison sequels against each other.  Highlander 2 is the tale of immortals that can only die by getting their heads chopped off doing battle again.  But this time they're aliens, coming back to life, and fighting under a sky roof.  Never mind, it's complicated.  The Prophecy 2 has Christopher Walken reprising his role as Gabrielle, still determined to wipe humanity off of the Earth.

We break up the formula for one week.  Today Zac and Biggs offer reviews of three independent movies in theaters right now:  Revenge of the Green Dragons, The Blue Room, and Dear White People.