Esn: Eloquently Saying Nothing

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming from NASA headquarters, Washington DC. Everything is all high tech and shiny. Nerds are free to roam like kings and blow things up to release any passive aggression they pick up when they actually hit the real world. Needless to say Stav is at home. Anyways, whilst taking a break from a tour of the place we steal some state of the art audio equipment and get started recording. In this episode we talk about; BUCKET BATH | ANGELS WITH DIRTY FACES | THE CHAMP | THE EFFEMIZATION OF MEN | WHEN CAN MEN CRY | WHATS THE POINT IN PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT RACES | WHEN WE WERE CONCIOUS OF SEXUALITY | SICKLE CELL AND IT’S EFFECTS All done. Tour over and all the free NASA gifts we can carry. Even took a picture with some Will Smith looking dude that worked for the military security there… Sweet. See y'all in two weeks time. Eloquently Saying Nothing until the next time when we start saying something. S4L! [Background Music: Mac Miller - The Question]

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming from space…. Yes, the dark side of the moon. We wanted to see what it was like. It’s cold and lacks atmosphere. Not exactly the best holiday in the world… And it’s seems like it’s raining!!! How the hell does it rain in space when the clouds are below us. Anyways, we set up shop and got to it. In this episode we talk about; MALE GROOMING | THE PRODUCTS WE USE ON OUR SKINS | METROSEXUALITY | WHICH ONE OF THE BROTHERS IS SLIMMER | HOLIDAYS | GETTING STARED AT ON HOLIDAY CAUSE YOU’RE BLACK | COUNTRIES CHOOSING TO STAY COLONISED | WHAT IT MEANS WHEN A MAN HAS SEX WITH A WOMAN AND DOESN’T KISS HER | SHOUTING IN A RELATIONSHIP | HOW TO DEAL WITH VEXNESS IN A RELATIONSHIP Show done and we gone. The French is a bit better, the eyes…. Not so good. See y'all in two weeks time. Eloquently Saying Nothing until the next time when we start saying something. S4L! [Background Music: YC - Racks]

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming from Mayotte Islands off the coast of Africa. It’s interesting learning the history of this place we have now called Little France-ish. It’s an island, so they’re lots of beach and we just chilling out watching the women… and fish. Anyways, in-between fish watching we set up studio and got to recording for y'all. In this episode we talk about; AVENGERS ASSEMBLE MOVIE | THE GREATEST MURDER IN MOVIE HISTORY | TOILET ASSISTANTS | ONE PAPER TOWEL WHEN WASHING HANDS | IF MEN ARE INTIMIDATED BY INTELLECTUAL WOMEN | TAKING DIRECTIONS WHEN DRIVING | INTERVIEWERS AND INTERVIEWEES THAT ARE BOTH BLACK IN A WORK PLACE THAT ISN’T | MEN HAVE BETTER HAIR THAN WOMEN Show done and we gone. The French is a bit better, the eyes…. Not so good. See y'all in two weeks time. Eloquently Saying Nothing until the next time when we start saying something. S4L! [Background Music: French Montana - Shot Caller]

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming from ringside at a WWE match. It’s intense here, we got the microphones and are commentating as best we can. All the “Ooooohhhhs” and “Wooooooahhhhhhs” you can shake a dead dog at. It’s a chunk of fun for sure. During the breaks we took time out to record the podcast off the high of it all. So, here we go. In this episode we talk about; WRESTLEMANIA AND THE ROCK | WOULD YOU SEND YOUR CHILD TO A SCHOOL WHERE NO-ONE WANTED HER KIND FOR THE SAKE OF FUTURE GENERATIONS | IS IT COOL FOR A MAN TO COOK FOR A MAN | COULD A MAN TAKE BEING SPAT AT FOR A FILM ROLE | OR LET HIS WOMAN GET BANGED FOR A FILM ROLE | Show done, but the wrestling is still going on and Oooooohhhhhh, that dude got knocked out!!! NOOOO, he broke the count! This is too much, we busy having fun. Can’t talk now. See y'all in two weeks time. Eloquently Saying Nothing until the next time when we start saying something. S4L! [Background Music: DJ Mujava - Township Funk]

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming from a launch party. All the champaign you can drink and half nekkid girls serving us. It’s a good life. A couple of people went into a private room for some further attention, but we’re not in the position to disclose whom. Anyways, when we all got back together and spoke on a few things, we decided to record the show. So we went somewhere quiet (and filled with half nekkid chicks) and started recording In this episode we talk about; WHERE MY KEYS, WHERE MY PHONE | WAHALA IN EXTRA MEDIUM SHIRTS | IF YARDIE & JAMMO ARE OFFENSIVE TERMS | PASSA PASSA | DO MEN CARE ABOUT ROMANCE | IS EXTREME SEX ACCEPTABLE FOR THE FIRST TIME | CAN A SEXY ACT BE ROMANTIC | WHAT IS A WINGMAN AND WHAT ARE THE RULES AND ETIQUETTE OF BEING A WINGMAN | DOES THE TITLE OF WINGMAN CHANGE WHEN THE DUDE STARTS TO GET SERIOUS AND FAITHFUL TO THE CHICK | THE UGLY FRIEND VS THE GOOD LOOKING BITTER FRIEND | Ok, so we’ve done recording BUT I think we might stick around here for a little while longer… Just

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming from Jamaica. We thought we’d show those guys a different side of England after Harry’s outing. He did a good job mind you. Just using it as an excuse for some Sun, Sand, Sea and Shrimp really… No Sensimilia. Anyways, whilst chilling out on some beach side Rum Shake, we set up shop and got recording. In this episode we talk about; STAYING INSIDE VIRGIN AFTER YOU’VE FINISHED BANGING | REJUVENATING PENNIS’ | SUDDERING | HOW WE’D FEEL ABOUT OUR PARTNERS SAYING WE’RE NOT REALLY THEIR TYPE | NEVER DATING SOMEONE OF YOUR HERITAGE | THREE COURSE MEALS AT CINEMA | TALKING DURING MOVIES | PEOPLE DYING IN 15 MINUTES OF A MOVIE | EFFECTS OF WAR | US SOLIDER KILLING 16 AFGHAN CIVILIANS | KNOY2012 + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group here. It’s a few hundred people debating the same stuff as we do on the podcast, so if you want your say on the subjects, you know

Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from a small bedroom in East London, back to where it all started. Just two dope boyz and a Cadillac. Most of The Fest were on a hiatus so it was left down to Webslinger and Stavros to do the show on their lonesome, so they took it back to the roots. By the way, they aren't dope boyz and they can't afford a brand new Cadillac either. But that's neither here nor there... In this episode we talk about; WHITNEY HOUSTON | WHITNEY HOUSTON VS MARIAH CAREY | VALENTINES DAY | FEAR OF LOVE | REAL TALK | JOKES MADE IN BAD TASTE | GOING TO HELL | WHO'S MORE FILTHY | WHAT WE'VE BEEN THINKING ABOUT RECENTLY | ILLUMINATI | TWO FACED-NESS | HONESTY AND THE TROUBLE IT'LL BRING YOU + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group at www.esnpodcast.com/group. It's a few hundred people debating the same stuff as we do on the podcast, so if you want your say on the subjects,

Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from the coldest place on the known planet. We call this place London. Kai! It's NO JOKE! Minus degrees is standard right now, the snow has been falling, just not settling. After the mild Autumn we had, Winter is making sure we know and understand it is not following suit. So we met up at the studio, turned the heat right up and got to spreading some sunlight for you. In this episode we talk about; GROWN MEN CUTTING LINES IN THEIR HEAD | POSITIVE THINKING | ADULT MEN HAVING ISSUES GROWING BEARDS | ED MILIBAND STABBING DAVID MILIBAND IN THE BACK | THE LEVEL IN WHICH WE DON'T RATE ED MILIBAND | DAVID CAMERON'S CHARISMA | WHAT CELEBRITY COULD RUN THE COUNTRY | ALEX FERGUSON VS JOSE MOURINHO | + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group at www.esnpodcast.com/group. It's a few hundred people debating the same stuff as we do on the podcast, so if you want yo

ello ESNers, This week we’re coming from a ship on the Ligurian Sea. We on a cruise baby and it’s all going smooth. We got drink, food and great company. Even the Sun is shining. So whilst the going is good, we broke out the equipment and recorded a show for you guys In this episode we talk about; FARTS AND HOW YOU HAVE TO BE COMFORTABLE TO BREAK WIND IN FRONT OF A PARTNER… I KID YOU NOT | IF MEN ARE BASHING WOMEN OR NOT | THE EFFECTS OF CENSORSHIP DUE TO COMPLAINTS | HOW HONESTY IS ONLY COOL WHEN IT’S POSITIVE | IF YOU CAN HAVE A CONVERSATION WITHOUT ANY QUESTIONS | SPITTING ON VAGIN | FLORESCENT VAGINA | DESIGNER LOGO CONDOMS | IF WE WERE A CAPTAIN AND A SHIP WAS GOING DOWN, WOULD WE DUCK AND DIVE OR STICK AND STAY | + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group at www.esnpodcast.com/group. It’s a few hundred peMLSWople debating the same stuff as we do on the podcast, so if you want your say

Hello ESNers, We can’t lie, this weeks show isn’t actually that good. We’re ashamed to say but the we were all tired, hungover and high from New Years and it shows. Jheeez, it’s not a good luck, we have to apologise. In this episode we talk about; MEH, IT’S CRAP ANYWAYS + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group at www.esnpodcast.com/group It’s a few hundred peMLSWople debating the same stuff as we do on the podcast, so if you want your say on the subjects, you know what to do. + If you want the show direct to your itunes, go to www.esnpodcast.com/itunes and hey presto, a new show every Friday to your PC & Ipod/phone We’re actually apologising for this episode. But we’ll be back in TWO WEEKS with some fire for you. Eloquently Saying Nothing until the next time when we start saying something. S4L!

Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from the mansion we rented for the New Years party. It hasn't started yet but we were decorating and took a break to record the show. We had a full house and grabbed Peter Swift and first timer Topsy to join in with some pre-new years fun. During the process, some drink was drunk and.... well, let's say we had to edit with a bit more clarity this time around. Anyways, In this episode we talk about; MISTRESSES VS PROSTITUTES | WHAT WE'D ACTUALLY PAY FOR A WOMEN TO DO (NO SEX) | IF WE'D BE A KEPT MAN AND LET THE WOMEN 'TAKE CARE' OF THINGS | BEING BROKE AND HAPPY VS BEING WELL OFF AND HAPPY | TESTING WOMEN | SMELLING YOUR PARTNERS NUMBER 2 | HOW TO TREAT A FUTURE IN-LAW | WHAT A CORRECT WOMAN IS + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group at www.esnpodcast.com/group. It’s a few hundred peMLSWople debating the same stuff as we do on the podcast, so if you wa

Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from that Santa's crib. It's a nice place. Small and modest but the size of the warehouse he's got in the back is serious. Only God can tell you what this dude is doing in there but he's talking about clearing it out soon, dropping the load somewhere and coming home full and drunk. His wife is not even suspect. He must be a good man. Anyways, after a tour of the area we got back and went down to work with recording duties. In this episode we talk about; WHAT PEOPLE USED TO STEAL | THE PRICE OF VIRGINITY | TRAIN AND BUS ETIQUETTE | WOULD WE PUSH OVER AN OLD WOMAN FOR CASH | WOULD WE KILL OUR CHILD OR ONE THOUSAND STRANGERS IF WE HAD TO CHOOSE | MUSLIM SURNAME PROTOCOL | CRAZY STORIES ON HOW MEN HAVE TRIED TO KILL THEIR WOMEN | HOW R. KELLY HAS GOT AWAY WITH SEXING AND PEEING ON AN UNDER-AGE GIRL | IF WE'D GO OUT WITH A FEMALE FRIEND THAT WANTS US BUT IS ALREADY MARRIED | THE IMPORTANCE OF MARRIAGE | IF WE'D HAVE MORE THAN ONE WIFE IF THE WOMEN WERE COOL WITH IT | WHO LOOKS

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming Lagos, Nigeria. We’re bringing you the smells, the sights, the sounds and the beauty of the homeland. We can’t tell you how good the feeling is to bring you the show from here. So, after eating some food in one of the joints here that charge you by the size of meat, we settle in for the night, start the generator and get recording with some very, very special guests. Mr & Mrs Williams, the parents of Stav & Wahala, Uncle Tunde, long time family friend and Mad Cat, Stav’s better half. It’s a mighty, mighty full house. In this episode we talk about; WHOSE NAME COMES FIRST FROM A COUPLE WHEN SIGNING A CARD | EGO IN RELATIONSHIPS | IF WE’D STICK BY A PARTNER IF THEY WENT TO JAIL FOR 15 YEARS | NELSON AND WINNIE MANDELA | EGO IN RELATIONSHIPS | HOW YOU CAN SHOW YOUR PARTNER YOU LOVE THEM WITHOUT SAYING THE WORDS | IF WE’D SAVE OUR SPOUSE OR CHILDREN IF THEY WERE DROWNING AND WE COULD ONLY SAVE ONE | WHO IS MORE IMPORTANT, WIFE/HUSBAND OR CHILD | THE REASON FOR LIFE | AN ALTERN

ELOQUENTLY SAYING NOTHING | EPISODE FIFTYNINE MOBILE PLAY HERE [FEAT. WEBSLINGER, WAHALA, SIMPLE SIMON & STAVROS] Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from Kepler 22B, you know, that 'new planet' that NASA has been going on about. Pfffft, we've been vacating here for some time and yes there's life here. Trust us, that's why we come back...... So, during one of the frequent storms that happens here we set up and got to recording. In this episode we talk about; HOW DEPRIVED OF DISNEY STAVROS IS | DUBBED OVER FILMS | WHAT A RADIOGRAM IS | THE SOON TO BE INFAMOUS 'GAZA ME SEH FOREVER' CLIP | WHAT YOU TELL YOUR MATE WHEN HE'S STARTS LIKING A GIRL THAT ISN'T UP TO PAR | IF WE WOULD TELL OUR GIRLFRIENDS IF OUR MATES DIDN'T LIKE THEM, WOULD WE OR NOT | IF WE COULD ONLY ASK THREE QUESTIONS TO FIND INFO ON A CHICK WE JUST MET, WHAT WOULD THEY BE | THE BIGGEST LESSONS WE'VE LEARNT IN LIFE + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say t

Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from dead bang in the middle of Oxford Circus, London. We heard the Christmas lights actually look quite impressive this year. We'll slap the the dude who told us that cause him lie a lie. Meh. It's all good, the crew did some shopping and got some presents sorted. When we found a nice quiet coffee shop we set up the ever present equipment and got to work recording this weeks episode... So. In this episode we talk about; 2016 | OUR FAVOURITE NURSERY RHYMES | VERY. VERY SPECIAL GHANAIAN MOVIE TRAILERS | 2016 | THE POINT IN FACEBOOK POKING | GARY SPEED AND HIS PASSING | 2016 | WHY SUCCESSFUL PEOPLE MIGHT COMMIT SUICIDE | IF WE STILL WATCH WRESTLING | 2016 | THE SECRET VIEWINGS OF SUNSET BEACH | THE ABUNDANCE OF MEN CRYING THESE DAYS | 2016 | LOW V NECK T-SHIRTS ON MEN | IF WE'D FORGIVE A WOMAN FOR A VARIETY OF REASONS: LIES ABOUT AGE, SECRETS ABOUT DIVORCE STATUS, HIDDEN PAST OF PORN | 2016 | AND WEBSLINGER SINGING + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click

ELOQUENTLY SAYING NOTHING | EPISODE FIFTYSEVEN MOBILE PLAY HERE [FEAT. WEBSLINGER, WAHALA, SIMPLE SIMON, MR WOLF & STAVROS] UNFORTUNATELY, THIS WEEK THE RECORDING OF ELOQUENTLY SAYING NOTHING GOT CORRUPTED DURING THE EDITING PROCESS AND THUS WE ONLY HAVE THE OUT-TAKES (WHICH SURVIVED THE FIRE) TO GIVE YOU. IT’S STILL FUNNY, ALBEIT SHORTER AND WITH NO MUSIC. WE’RE STILL TRYING TO GET THE ORIGINAL PODCAST BACK FOR YOU GUYS, BUT IN THE PURSUIT TO HAVE SOMETHING FOR YOU THIS WEEK, WE HAVE THIS. PLEASE ACCEPT OUR APOLOGY FROM THE TEAM! ESN TEAM. _______________________________________________________________________ Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from the fevela's of Brazil. The glorious ghetto's. It's strange, the smiles, the smells, the sights. It's a beautiful thing honestly to see some of the things we've seen. The way the houses stack up, the sunset from the top of the hills and the Brazilian bootay's! *sigh* It's a good look. Anyways, between peeking, we took time out to record a show for you. In

ELOQUENTLY SAYING NOTHING | EPISODE FIFTYSIX MOBILE PLAY HERE [FEAT. WEBSLINGER, WAHALA, SIMPLE SIMON, MR WOLF & STAVROS] Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from just outside our live event. It was a sight to behold. On the 14th Nov 11 we hooked up with the Let's Talk guys and took over their debate night. The place was packed out and full of good vibes. We debated our hearts out and then everyone went home. We recorded the show for y'all. In this episode we talk about; OUR VIEWS ON THE LET'S TALK ESN TAKEOVER | CARIBBEAN RESTAURANTS LACK OF FOOD | THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN SEX AND MAKING LOVE | HIGH HEELS DURING SEX | IF MEN HOLDING BACK ON CASUAL SEX IS NORMAL OR NOT | THINGS THAT WOMEN DO TO THEIR BODIES TO MAKE THEM LOOK GOOD THAT MAKE THEM LOOK RUBBISH | + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group at www.esnpodcast.com/group. It's a few hundred people debating the same stuff as we do on

Hello ESNers, This week we’re coming from Wall Street. We’ve got together with the Protesters and are saying our piece against the corrupt banking system of the world. Of course we might be talking to a lady or two on the way, but only to keep their momentum up. It’s our duty. So before we left this one chicks house we set up equipment and started recording just for you In this episode we talk about; FOOTBALL | FOOTBALL | A BIT MORE FOOTBALL | WHAT A NIGERIAN LOOKS LIKE | THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN AFRICANS AND CARIBBEAN’S | THE TOP BOY DRAMA AND ITS REVIEWS | WHAT ACTORS MAY HAVE TO DO TO MAKE IT | ENTERTAINMENT VS ETHICS | IF SOMEONE CAN BE TOO SEXY | WHAT ‘A SEX’ IS AND WHO HAS ‘A SEX’ | + Send your questions to questions@esnpodcast.com or click on the blue button on the right panel and tell us what you got to say there. + Join the Facebook group at www.esnpodcast.com/group. It’s a few hundred people debating the same stuff as we do on the podcast, so if you want your say on the subjects, you know what to d

Hello ESNers, This week we're coming from the new cinema in Hackney... Can you believe we got a full proper screen just walking distances from our gaff. Thought we'd have to give it a go and see what it's like. The film was Gone With The Wind and they split it in two with an intermission for people to stretch their poor legs. We took the opportunity to get down to some work and record the show. So here we go. In this episode we talk about; STAV'S SEXY RADIO VOICE | IF WE'D TAKE THE JOB OF OUR DEMOTED FRIEND OR NOT | IF WE COULD WORK WITH AS SUBORDINATES TO OUR PARTNERS | THE IMPORTANCE OF COMFORTABLE SILENCES | THE BIGGEST COMPLIMENTS YOU CAN PAY SOMEONE | THE DESCRIPTION OF A PHAT PU**Y | HOW SOME MEN THROW AROUND THE WORD 'BEAUTIFUL' | WEBSLINGER TRAILS HIS first ATTEMPT AT COOKING PUFF PUFF | IF IT'S WORST TO BE IN A RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE THAT TALKS TOO LITTLE OR TOO MUCH | IS IT WRONG OR RIGHT TO ADOPT A CHILD FROM A TOTALLY DIFFERENT COLOUR/CULTURE | IF IT'S MORE SELFISH TO GET AN ABORTION OR NOT I

BOES MOUTH BOX ESN INTERVIEW!!!! THE AUDIO! So for those of you who missed the show we did on the radio Saturday 30th October, here's the audio for you. We discuss the origins of ESN, the personalities of each of the members and why it's against God to shave under a man's armpits. Peace & Enjoy