God Awful Movies

In this week's show, Eli, Noah, and Heath team up for an atheist review of Blood Freak, the single greatest use of the cinematic medium in both history and future. It's the classic story of boy meets girl, eats poisonous science-turkey, gets turned into a blood drinking mutant, and then turns to Jesus. If you'd like to pick up tickets to see us live in Chicago on Friday, January 13th, you can find them here: https://www.eventbrite.com/e/god-awful-movies-live-with-cognitive-dissonance-tickets-29713113723 If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

On this week's episode, Eli, Heath, and Noah team up for an atheist review of King's Faith; the story of a human who does things, many of which are unrelated to one another. That's the closest we could collectively come to a plot synopsis. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

This week, Eli, Heath, and Noah team up for an atheist review of Holyman Undercover, the story of a bunch of Christian extremists trying to write about other Christian extremists so as to make them seem wacky. Watch as Baptist evolution deniers throw down against Anabaptist zipper deniers in a film that features David AR White taking on dual roles, and failing miserably at both. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

This week, Eli, Noah, and Heath team up for an atheist review of The Atheist Delusion, a hybrid of man on the street interviews with high teenagers who can't explain cosmology to Ray Comfort, and left over stock footage of animals. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

This week, Eli and Noah team up with writer, comedian, improv artist, and guest masochist Keisha Zollar for an atheist review of "I'm Not Ashamed"; a film about how it's okay to exploit the deaths of thirteen people in a tragic school shooting, as long as you're doing it for Jesus. If you'd like to hear/see more of Keisha, you can find her website here: http://www.keishazollar.com/ If you'd like to keep up with her on Twitter, you'll find her here: https://twitter.com/keishaz Special thanks to Morgan Clarke for some background music in this week's show. If you'd like to hear him do music for realsies, you can find him here: https://soundcloud.com/morgandclarke If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

In this week's episode, Noah, Heath, and Eli join you live from QED in Manchester, England for an atheist review of "Expelled: No Intelligence Allowed." In this obituary to Ben Stein's career, the monotone gopher of humanity posits a direct link between Darwinian evolution and Nazi death camps, and doesn't even have the decency to beat around the bush about it. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

This week, Eli, Noah, and Heath team up for an atheist review of "Wicked Vultures", the third film in the "Vultures of Horror" series. Listen along as Kwame continues not to be the chief, his wife continues to use magical laser-vultures to nominally increase her bodega sales, and the producers fail once more to buy a god damn pop filter. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

In this week's episode, Noah, Heath, and Eli team up once more for an atheist review of Confessions of a Prodigal Son; the heart bypassing story of some middle-class white kid that mistook being hungover for having real problems. Also, three minutes and nine seconds of Kevin Sorbo. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts

On this week's episode, Noah, Heath, and Eli team up with the Scibabe, Yvette D'Entremont, for a skeptical review of Vaxxed: Cover Up to Catastrophe. In this baby-manslaughtering propaganda piece, we learn that some people shouldn't be trusted with medical licenses, others shouldn't be trusted with children, and still others with video cameras and editing equipment. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon: http://patreon.com/godawful Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/EvilGiraffesOnMars/?fref=ts Sources: http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2014/08/28/a-bad-day-for-antivaccinationists-a-retraction-and-the-cdc-whistleblower-issues-a-statement/ https://leftbrainrightbrain.co.uk/2016/03/22/andrew-wakefield-releases-the-trailer-for-his-william-thompson-video-slick-production-and-dishonesty/ http://scienceblogs.com/insolence/2014/08/28/a-bad-d

On this week's episode, Noah, Heath and Eli team up for an atheist review of Time Changers; a cinematic exploration of the dumbest possible use of a time machine.

This week, Eli, Noah, and Heath join up with a mysterious friend for an atheist review of The Unexpected Bar Mitzvah, a movie about a young Christian boy in South Dakota and his relentless efforts to cure his Jewish neighbors of their Judaism. Seriously. That's what it's about. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page.

This week, Eli, Noah, and Heath team up for an atheist review of God's Club, the story of Stephen Baldwin trying desperately to open his eyes up all the way. Set amid the backdrop of a churchless town in Vermont, a faithful science teacher tries to overcome the death of his wife, his lack of acting talent, and a couple of atheist mean girls with murder on their mind. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page.

In this week's episode, Eli, Noah, and Heath team up for an atheist review of The Masked Saint, the story of Nacho Libre, except for realsies. This convoluted and uncomfortable hybrid combines elements of wrestling movies, superhero flicks, and Christian cinema to form a confused mess of stupidity. That we watched. On purpose. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page.

It's been a year, so we figured Eli had finally earned an episode off.  So we invited Tom and Cecil to join us for an atheist review of God Not Dead; the review that, in a round about way, got this show started. Incidentally, if you'd like to hear Eli's thoughts on God's Not Dead, check out Episode 59 of The Scathing Atheist. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page.

This week Eli, Heath, and Noah team up for an atheist review of Passion of the Christ, also known as the first inhalation after Mel Gibson's last gasp of sanity. In the first ever live record of God Awful Movies, a sold out crowd at the People's Improv Theater in Midtown Manhattan join us in a night of mockery, revelry, and blatant anti-Semitism. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page. This podcast is a production of Puzzle in a Thunderstorm, LLC; copyright 2016, all rights reserved.

In this week's episode, Eli, Noah, and Heath team up for a skeptical review of What the Bleep do we Know?, the 2004 classic of quantum woo. From "scientific" studies that show you can meditate away high murder rates to "scientific" "proof" that water gets sad when you say mean things to it, this film crams so much bullshit into one place there's no way to describe it but impacted. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page.

On this week's episode, we pull a late audible and Heath, Noah, and Eli join forces for an atheist review of Vultures of Horror 2. In the second edition of everyone's favorite supernatural Nigerian Christian soap opera, nothing happens. But he still talk about it for an hour. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page. This podcast is a production of Puzzle in a Thunderstorm, LLC.

In this week's episode, Heath, Noah, and Eli team up for an atheist review of Day When Sun Rises in West: Film that Shock the World. In this tale of inevitable destruction, four Muslim friends wonder if the end times will disturb their exciting life of chicken eating, rubble visiting, and cartoon sound effects. Combining poorly translated air conditioner instructions style subtitles, visual effects that wouldn't have made it passed the Vultures of Horror directors, and the typical Muslim tendency to take all the crazy up to eleven, Day When Sun Rises in West earns a place towards the very top of the "worst nonsense we've ever sat through" rankings. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page. This podcast is a production of Puzzle in a Thunderstorm, LLC. Copyright 2016, all rights reserved.

This week, Ishmael Brown joins us to talk about Would A Man Rob God? ... It's a slightly musical stage play about prosperity churches, performed for a very unimpressed live studio audience, and made into a movie that all takes place in the same room.  And no Brie Larson. --- If you'd like to hear more from Ishmael, you can check out his podcast, or his Facebook page. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page. This podcast is a production of Puzzle in a Thunderstorm, LLC

This week, Callie Wright and Ari Stillman of the Gaytheist Manifesto Podcast join Eli, Noah, and Heath for an atheist review of Accidental Activist, a film about a bigot who struggles with the harsh consequences of his bigotry while trying his best to maintain in despite society moving forward without him. It's a movie where we're almost certain that they meant for the bigot to be the good guy, but it's really hard to tell. --- If you'd like to hear more from Callie and Ari, you can check out their podcast, their blog, or you can like their Facebook Page. If you’d like to make a per episode donation, please check us out on Patreon Our theme music is written and performed by Ryan Slotnick of Evil Giraffes on Mars. If you’d like to hear more, check out their Facebook Page.