Beth & Meg &...

So we had to push back the second half of our sad movie list because - did you see the Academy Awards?!?! Yes, the Hollywood bubble was burst a little bit this week and we are here to sift through the wreckage. We also talk Meg and Shane's dream trip to the temple of basketball, the death of the William Rehnquist of daytime TV, and Bethany's very low Redbox standards. Also, Australian clapping, why CPS might need to be called to protect Moana, and the ULTIMATE "you WISH you still had me" moment. #Afflacus #HeavensDoneWaiting #TSAlovin #kubball

It's Oscars week and we discuss the only films Hollywood deems worthy of the big prize - tearjerkers. Yes, we list off the movies that have reduced us to a blubbering mess but not before talking the going-ons on The Satellite of Love, which celebrities we would most like to slap, and why Harrison Ford is heading for an intervention. Also, the phenomenon of men and sports, Icelandic pizza toppings, and requiring an interpreter whilst visiting Boston. #playingforpapes #DJmyfuneral #MonteCristoDay #youdownwithMMC #Idipyoudapwedip #itsacobblah

It's the season of love and we are here to discuss its many facets in this week's episode. We chat about how every night is Valentines in our homes, how Mr. Darcy had one too many leg days, and how we are one greasy pair of sweat pants away from packing up and moving to Grey Gardens. Also, why we need a restraining order against Christy Brinkley, the out-of-whack economics of gourmet pizza, and our newest crush and favorite gourmand- Tim P.  #thinkofEngland #freedomtowers  #getGuttenberged #guaclikeaman 

Well, Punxsutawney Phil stuck his head out of his hole and then quickly went back in to avoid the angry mobs, but you've come to the right place for a little respite from the cold. Yes, we talk the day and the movie "Groundhog Day", including the theory of how Ned Ryerson  can be used to teach particle physics. Also, typecasting Tara Reid, Tostitos bags for teetotalers, and our girl crush on Marion Cotillard. #DisneyOnIce #ImNotTHEGod #DeportHer #WinonaForever #GymProofYourMarriage #GroundhogDay

It’s the second half of our Rogue One discussion where we talk android Twitter battles, really inconvenient trap doors, and the angst of Deep Space Thrombosis. Also, ideas for the next “Pirates of the Caribbean” movie, we drop an embarrassing amount of “Spaceballs” quotes, and talk possible new challenges on “The Apprentice”. “#IAmOneWithTheSchwartz #alrightalrightalright #RogueOne

SPOILER ALERT!!! It's been a year since we last discussed a Star Wars movie and it's time for Rogue One to get its own discussion on our show. Little Brother Derek joins us as we discuss this new genre of film he dubs an "InBetweenQual" but not before getting into an idea to marry HGTV with the Hunger Games, the tyranny of science fair projects, and how creepy 90's sitcoms really were. #incredulity #cardboardcuts #I'mJoey #HotRod #RogueOne

Listen as we dig Meg out of the snow with a rousing game of "Would You Rather", but not before we talk a certain outgoing president, how we would impress Marshawn Lynch, and why Richard Branson might want to bone up on note taking in case he ever runs into us. Also, what we expect for a $20 date, how we are JUST like Taylor Swift, and creepy pillowcases. #notthatinnocent #nojudgement #meandmarshawn #softcam #peakedatfour #meganstheme

Best of 2016? What are they thinking?!?! Yes, yes, we know. It was tough, folks, but we managed to find some stories which might give you less of a "What was up with that crap-fest?" feeling we all seem to have about 2016. Find yourself thinking, "I guess it wasn't all that bad" as you hear about reasons to take up skiing, interesting candle scents, and Bethany's dream job. Also, hear about Megan's demands upon the moment of her death, Bethany's run-in with Uncle Rico, and what we have decided really is the most appropriate resolution for us to make. #bloodoath #masterthewedge #leanin #sorrynotsorry #selflove #whatmakesmeggiehappy 

It's our favorite time of the year, the time when we reflect on the things we are grateful for and specifically for the blessing of adoption. November is National Adoption month and we are celebrating it, but not before we discuss the craziness  of the recent election, how we could all learn a little something from a pair of frozen moose, and discuss why all men might want to invest in a hot pad. 

This week we wrap up our interview with the lovely Nancy Turner as we discuss her book, These Is My Words. We talk about why you didn't need to be too creative while naming babies in the 19th century, how it was only decent to fit giving birth to them between chores, and why women's journals from that era were perhaps not the most trustworthy. We also chat about the responsibility of the author to history (DO NOT CHALLENGE Nancy on the difference between a sword and a calvary saber as you will only find yourself red-faced), why we have Alice Walker to thank for this book, and we get a glimpse into how seriously Nancy takes her spaghetti sauce. 

What a lovely week to have Nancy Turner on the show to discuss her work "These Is My Words", a bonafide Beth & Meg favorite! We also talk why giving birth is preferable to algebra, why you should stop at a DIY store before your next date, why all rejection letters should come from Asia, and why Nancy is proof that life begins at 40. 

This week we wrap up our month of paranormality (it's a word, look it up) with a true American horror story as we interview the owner and proprietor of the Lizzie Borden Bed and Breakfast, Lee-ann Wilber.  She gives us some great insights into the murders of Andrew and Abby Borden, the trial of Lizzie, and the aftermath of those horrible events. She also shares why you need some pretty big cajones if you want to spend the night in her establishment - unless you sleep well with things that go bump in the night... #LizzieBorden #IWouldNotMindBeingHauntedByJoannaGaines #GotMyNunchucks #GETACAT 

Ever wanted to meet a real Ghostbuster? Well, you are in luck as we welcome Jeff Lewis, co-founder of the Arizona Ghostbusters, to discuss his love of all things Gozer and the charitable work it has inspired. Also, the majesty of Canadian cuisine, why abstinence-only education might lead to a higher number of severe concussions, and how a diet of Cactus Coolers and Funyuns might cut into your dating life. #AZGhostbuster #BustingMakesMeFeelGood #JackWhite #IBelongInHufflepuffHouse

This week we mess with powers we don't understand as we tiptoe into the world of paranormal research with the man, the legend, and our cousin, Mark Beagley. We also talk other horrifying things like coming to terms with "maturing skin", the only time in the history of mankind when a restauranteur called out a certain pair of sisters for ordering too much Chinese food, and the rules which kick into effect should you ever poop your pants. Also, we use the word interesting about a gazillion times. Just a heads up, this episode has some pretty creepy stuff in it so you may want to listen without children or scaredy cats around. #Im40NotDead #ThatTooMuch #OnlySithsDealInAbsolutes #GetOutOfMeSatan #FamilyReunionsAreNotForTheFaintHearted

There's a crisp chill in the air and it's time to pull out your sweaters as we talk girls' weekend! That's right, we got the band back together and it involved foreign relations, granny panties, and what was probably not the weirdest thing to happen at Wal-Mart that day. Also, who we would choose Amanda Knox over for a roommate, how Megan was the Dita Von Teese of our high school, and why we feel there should be more Homie the Clown sightings.  #CookingWithCleavage #BigHairDontCare #SorryNotSorry #2DWorld #ItsJustLikeIreland

We are back and it is officially "bidness time". We talk the Great British Bake Off, why we are more interested in the Knope/Newport Jr. debates, and how much we enjoy watching Justin Bieber getting spanked. Also, we debate cheese vs. cake, and lament the fact that we never had a Bat Mitzvah/Quinceñera. Finally, we talk the Sundance Grand Jury Prize winning documentary detailing the failed mayoral candidacy of Anthony Weiner and Bethany finally uses the phrase "Get to da choppa!".

This week we continue our conversation with Kyle about the Netflix hit "Stranger Things" and things get... well, strange! We talk judicious punching, the etymology of a favorite crude word, and sigh for the awesomeness that was "Choose Your Own Adventure" books. Also, we put in an order with Edward Snowden for what we'd like to see next, discover that Kyle would totally go Broadway in a Sasquatch encounter, and speculate that Gaten Matarazzo's teeth must be hiding in the Upside Down.

STRANGER THINGS! Awesome friend of the show, Kyle, joins us this week as we talk all things Duffer Brothers, but not before we get into Netflix infidelity, what Katie Holmes and Kermit the Frog have in common, the state of Ethan Hawke's teeth, and why we only ever drink our OJ straight. Also, we find out we are not the worst siblings in the world and the phrase "Matthew Modine is a lovin' machine" is used. 

It's been a few weeks but we fill you in on all the goings on at our annual Jones/Johnson family retreat where we learn of Megan's true feelings regarding Taco Bell's Fresco Menu, why technically Bethany could have paid camping dues at the local honey pot, and the words our men like to whisper to us by light of a citronella candle. Also, learn of the moment we thought the rapture had occurred and we weren't too shocked to find out we'd been left behind, the Roller Derby names we have chosen to strike fear into the hearts of our opponents, and how hard it is to say goodbye to The Waco Kid.

Fabulous news today to temper the fact that Megan is unable to join us. Nancy Turner will be joining us in October to discuss "These Is My Words" and we could not be more excited! You can find her book here. Also, we would love to get some more reviews on iTunes, so take a moment and go here. Hit the blue "View in ITunes" button which will lead you to the "Ratings and Reviews" section where you can talk us up. Or down. Whatever. Just remember karma is real.